I’m lonely.
I’ve never felt this way about a part-time job.
It’s all his fault.
I’m the one ignoring him, but it’s still his fault.
The truth is, I know it too. I completely overstepped my bounds with Minato san.
I was so used to abusing people that I didn’t know what was right and wrong to say.
But I can’t apologize. My pride, which disgusts even me, gets in the way.
Two weeks ago, I really didn’t want to be an instructor, but thanks to this job, I started talking to him a lot, and before I knew it, I was enjoying my part-time job.
Even though I cursed that guy over and over again.
But nevertheless, he was always willing to talk to me.
I was shunned at university because of my bad mouth, I was really happy because I felt as if I had made a friend my own age.
But…..now,
I’m so lonely just because he doesn’t talk to me.
==================================
“Emiko kun, can I talk to you for a minute?”
I was just about to leave after my part-time job was over when the manager spoke to me.
“What is it?”
I asked him with a sour expression on my face.
“Well, just calm down. Why don’t you sit down for now?”
With that, the manager sat me down on the couch in front of the employee entrance.
The manager also sat down, leaving a space for one person.
“How’s your job going lately?”
“Thanks to you. I’m doing well.”
Even I try to speak respectfully to my superiors.
“It seems to me that you’re not doing very well right now.”
“Why is that? I’ve never failed at cooking before, have I?”
“I’m talking about relationships.”
I reacted, unintentionally, with a twitch.
“…..It’s going well.”
“Even I can tell that’s a lie. And you haven’t talked to Kento kun at all recently.”
“……I just don’t need to talk to him.”
“You seem awfully lonely these days.”
“……”
“What’s going on?”
“…I don’t want to say it.”
“I know you don’t want to tell me. It seems like it all started when you denied Minato kun’s dreams.”
“……Will I get fired?”
“If we fired you over something like this, we’d soon lose employees.”
“……”
“……You know? I know you have high pride as the daughter of the Miyahara Zaibatsu. But to me, what you have now is not pride, it’s just arrogance.”
I was upset.
“Was today’s content a lecture?”
I said sarcastically, frustrated that he had hit the bull’s-eye.
“I’m not here to lecture you. I’m here to warn you. I don’t know if it will resonate with you.”
“……I see.”
[ […….] ]
A short silence ensued.
It was the manager who spoke first.
“What do you think pride means in Japanese?”
“It’s something you’re proud of.”
I answered without a pause. This is common knowledge.
“Yes, that’s right. I want you to be proud of being able to apologize. That is, of course, if you can apologize.”
“……Proud to be able to apologize.”
I recited the words as I chewed over the meaning, partly because it was complicated.
“Yes. I think you apparently have a tendency to think that admitting your wrongdoing is an act that diminishes your value, or at least hurts your pride.”
……That’s right. That’s what I thought.
“But I think admitting one’s faults is an admirable virtue. People are surprisingly capable of recognizing other people’s faults, but not recognizing or pretending not to recognize their own.”
“……”
“You’re structurally built that way in the first place. You can easily see another person’s whole body, but you can’t see your own face without a mirror, no matter how hard you try, right?”
I see. He compared his earlier statement to the structure of the body.
“That’s all I’m trying to say. Well, think about it.”
I thought he was going to talk longer than that, but it was shorter than I expected, and I was disappointed.
“Is the lecture over? I thought it would be longer.”
“Actually, I’d like to tell you about a lot of things, such as people who make fun of part-time workers, for being unforgiving of those who fail to get the job done, and so on. But that’s enough for today.”
“…… see. Now if you’ll excuse me.”
I get up from the bench. The manager also lifted his heavy shoulders.
“Be careful when you return home.”
“Yes, sir. Goodbye.”
──Today’s story touched my heart a little.
I said in my heart to the manager as he turned his back on me.
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Huh, well maybe there’s hope for this girl.