Source
https://kakuyomu.jp/works/1177354054894733613/episodes/1177354054895659358
I am aware that it is obvious.
When I’m with Kouki, I get emotional easily. I am happy or sad at Kouki’s words, and I get upset at his every move. Obviously, this attitude is very different from the way I behave towards other boys. Seeing me like that, I think people around me naturally noticed. I think people naturally noticed that I was in love with Kouki.
I never had anyone confirm – except when I was talking about love with my good friends – but it had become a well-known fact in the junior high school, and it was only a matter of time before we started dating. —that was the rumor going around. Some of them were even convinced that we were already dating.
That was fine. I even thought it was convenient.
When I said, “I’m sorry,” they all just looked at me and said, “I knew it,” and left me alone. I was even hoping that the atmosphere around me would make Kouki conscious of me ……. I was secretly hoping that Kouki would say something like, “Let’s really go out together”. Well, such a good thing was never going to happen. Kouki didn’t even seem to be aware of the rumors until the very end.
Anyway–.
Because I was that obvious. No one made fun of us any longer. Whether we were going to and from school together or fighting in the classroom, we were all ignored. No one looked at us with curiosity. It was like a conservatory. It was the perfect environment for unrequited love. I had been enjoying my unrequited love without any interference from anyone.
That’s why …… I have no resistance
This – the lukewarm look I feel from the side is so uncomfortable.
My face is hot and my whole body is aching and restless. I don’t know what to do.
I want to scream, “Ah, don’t look at me~! I held back the scream, hugged Hanpenman, and timidly looked at him with only my gaze.
Then
“Hi, Honami chan. Welcome.”
Standing in the entrance of the living room was a slender, tall, slender man. He was wearing a plain T-shirt, a loose-fitting dark blue cardigan, and black skinny pants underneath. His slightly long hair was permed, and the smile on his face was neither tight nor decorative. The overall atmosphere was rough and laid-back, so much so that it seemed as if time was passing slowly only around that person. It is quite different from the serious-looking Kouki, though. Both of them must have resembled their mother. His calm face is very similar to Kouki’s, and his eyes, gently narrowed behind his dark-rimmed glasses, are just like Kouki’s, calm and gentle.
Kouki’s six years older brother – Hiroyuki san
He is a mysterious person with a fast pace and a hard to grasp personality,……, but he has played with me a lot since I was little, and when he found us fighting, he would intervene with sweets in his hand. He is like a real big brother to me too.
But I think that’s why it’s …….
Because I think of Hiroyuki san as if he were my family member. That’s why I feel even more …… uncomfortable.
The way Hiroyuki looks at me when I’m fighting with Kouki, his gaze has somehow become more compassionate. That raw, warm gaze is as if to say, “I understand”. It was as if I could hear his heart telling me, “You really like my brother, don’t you?”
Just staring at me makes me feel embarrassed.
I turned my eyes away from Hiroyuki san’s as if to escape.
“…….S-Sorry to interrupt, Hiroyuki san.”
In a completely dead, withered voice, I whispered.
(TL/N : Once again, the chap 9 (The one before this) is the one from another volume of the novel, it’s already fixed but I’m really sorry for confusing you guys or maybe spoilering it a little, you can read it again to know the ‘right’ chap 9 :))
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