Source
https://kakuyomu.jp/works/1177354054922823111/episodes/1177354054933932675
“Phew…… nn!”
I stretched wide in the room all alone.
(This novel was good. …….)
An indescribable loneliness spreads through me after reading through a masterpiece.
I don’t want this moment to come, yet I can’t stop picking up the book.
It’s been a week since the summer vacation started.
I spent the whole time reading books.
Every time my stack of books dwindles, I experience the same feeling, and to make up for it, I pick up another book.
Just that repetition …….
I don’t think I miss that life itself.
It may seem tasteless for my first summer vacation as a high school student, but I don’t care about that.
I’m happy with this life, and I even think I’m enjoying the vacation to the fullest.
–I’m happy with my life, and I’m even enjoying my vacation.
Even if I keep getting messages from Sakurae, I have decided to leave her completely on this vacation. ……
But there are problems with this life, too.
I look at the desk where I used to stack my books, and there’s nothing on it.
Yes, there are no more books that I haven’t read.
I buy my books at bookstores.
Once I bought an old book on the Internet (though it must have been about four or five years since it was published) and received a tanned copy, I vowed never to buy books on the Internet again.
The downside of this, or rather, the downside of me having no school and no outside errands such as meeting friends, is that I have to go out just for that.
(I’ll see if I can go see it tomorrow. …….)
I could go back and read the books I’ve finished, but it’s my vacation and I only have so much time left.
I got the desire to touch as many works as possible anyway.
Deciding to go ahead with my homework today, I opened my problem book and began to solve it.
The next day.
I left home early.
I was going to go to a larger bookstore than I usually use, so I made it my goal to arrive at the store before it opened in order to minimize the chance of meeting someone I knew.
(Not that it hurts to be out of the house. …….)
It was the first time I had been outside in a week.
The sun was shining so brightly that I almost felt dizzy even though I was wearing a hat.
(……It’s been hot since morning. Let’s get this over with…)
I take the train to the big city.
I arrived at the building where about three floors are all bookstores, a little before opening time as planned.
(People…still few. But there are more than I thought there would be, and I guess people want to get their things done in the morning.)
A few minutes before the store opens, I rest in the shadow of the building and observe people on the street in a daze.
Many people seemed to be on their way to work at this time of the day, and many of those in plain clothes seemed to be older than me.
People my age probably meet up a little later in the day and go out for fun.
While I was thinking about such unimportant things, it was time for the store to open, so I entered the store.
(I bought quite a few, ……. When I get through this one, maybe I’ll go to the library next time.)
It’s fun just to go around a large bookstore.
I also picked up the books I was interested in and read the first one, so it took me quite a while.
I purchased a total of six books.
One comic book, four novels, and one book of essays by an actor whose lazy outlook on life that I like.
I rarely watch TV, but I have always admired his joyful way of life.
(I wish I could live in a daze and not think about anything. ……)
I am interested in this essay book the most among the ones I bought today.
I’m not so much an optimist as to say that I want to live alone, but I don’t want to live a life with a lot of social interaction.
I am comfortable being alone. ……
“Shota ……?”
It was already before noon because I took a long time to choose a book.
The streets were mostly young people, unlike in the morning.
–I was so distracted that I couldn’t help but turn around at the sound of a voice calling me.
“…….”
“Don’t look so bad, ……. It’s been a long time.”
The one who approached me with a wry smile on his face was my former friend, Wada Tomoki.
“Well, it’s good to see you, even if it’s just by chance. You’ve blocked me from contacting you, haven’t you?”
“…….”
It was hard to answer Tomoki’s question, and all I could think about was how to excuse myself and leave.
However, as if Tomoki could see through my inner thoughts of wanting to run away, he firmly grabbed my arm.
I had no choice but to prepare myself to talk for a little while.
“……I’m sorry, I won’t run away, so let me go. But Tomoki already knows, right? I was scared to hear from someone who knows …….”
“……I see.”
Tomoki lets go of my arm and scratches his head, as if it’s a bad decision.
“Sure, I heard all about it too. And I wanted to apologize to Shota…..”
“…… what?”
In response to my question, Tomoki bowed his head vigorously and said.
“I’m sorry! If I had been there at that time, I would have stopped it even if I had hit all of them, but because of that, Shota was ……!”
I could feel his genuine regret.
[Ah, Tomoki was like this,] I remembered now.
It’s not his fault
I knew that from then on.
The reason why I closed my ears to Tomoki’s words was because of my weakness.
Because of that weakness, I have caused him a lot of trouble.
That’s why …….
“I’m sorry too, ……. So please raise your head.”
“No! It’s my fault! I’ll do anything to get forgiveness! So ……!”
I dropped my fist bone on Tomoki’s head.
It was just a weak knock.
“I told you to stop in such a street. Stupid Tomoki.”
“Shota……!”
Tomoki looked up and saw me with a tearful expression on his face.
What a …… face you have, you idiot.
After that, Tomoki hugged me and this time I restrained him with a serious fist bump.
Tomoki is the best friend I’ve had in the three years of junior high school.
He is honest, intuitive, and stupid.
As far as I know, the school is the closest to where the junior high school is located.
It seems that Tomoki cannot attend the same school as me due to his academic ability, so he attends the high school closest to where my middle school is located.
We bought some drinks and sat down on a bench to talk.
“So those guys are almost all in the same school as Tomoki,…….”
“yeah. The top of the school caste is still the same as ever.”
Tomoki spat out, not seeming to be amused.
I remember when I first started junior high school, I was invited to join the group as an extra.
However, Tomoki is a beloved character who can fit in anywhere without belonging to any particular group.
Even if those guys see him as an enemy, they will not touch him because he should be overwhelmingly on their side.
“…… you didn’t let them do anything to you, did you?”
Tomoki laughed happily when I confirmed it even though I thought so.
“Don’t worry ……. I don’t know what they say about me behind my back, but they haven’t done anything to me.”
“I see,…….”
Tomoki puts his arm around my shoulders as I look down in relief.
“More than that, Shota. What about you?”
“What do you mean?”
“not like a girlfriend after something like that happened… But isn’t there someone you find interesting?”
Tomoki is probably genuinely concerned about my friendships.
But I can’t think of anyone worthy of an answer.
“I don’t have any ……. But there seem to be a lot of serious guys, so it suits me.”
“Hmmm. Is there anyone out there with a good eye for finding you like I do ……?”
“Don’t talk about me like I’m a bargain. …….”
In response to my complaint, he said, [You say something nice!] Tomoki burst out laughing.
It had been a long time since we had such an exchange.
I don’t know why I even tried to keep him away, now that I think about it.
But at the time, I felt like it was bothersome to have Tomoki worry about me.
(I’ll have to unblock him again later. …….)
As I was doing so, Tomoki’s phone rang.
Tomoki seemed flustered by this and said so to me.
“Ah! I’m sorry, Shota. It’s from the guy I was meeting.”
“Oh, well, I’m going to go now okay?”
“No, I’ll hang up soon, just give me a minute!”
“?….Yeah”
What is he in such a hurry? He tilts his head and waits as he was told to wait.
Tomoki started talking away from me, as if he didn’t want me to hear his conversation.
“I’m coming.. …… yes. I’m going……. What? Don’t come! Don’t come! Don’t come!”
(I’m …… away from you, but you’re too loud so I can hear you.)
It sounds like the person he’s supposed to be meeting is on his way over.
I finish my drink and put it in the trash, then I greet Tomoki, who looks busy, with my hand and approach him to leave.
I’ll probably have a chance to see him again if I send him a message later.
“Ha ……? you are already there?!”
(See you later, …….)
When I approach Tomoki and raise my hand, he notices it and looks surprised with his eyes wide open.
(? …Did I surprise you that much?)
I tilted my head at Tomoki’s exaggerated reaction and tried to pass by …….
“Ko-kokonoe-kun ……?”
Tomoki seemed surprised not by me, but by the person on the other side of me.
I also slowly turned my head to that voice.
“A-are you really Kokonoe-kun? ”
It was as if I was being emotionally reunited with her, and she was slowly approaching me with tears in her eyes.
I ignored that and awkwardly turned to Tomoki and asked.
“…… is this the person you’re meeting up with?”
I asked in a trembling voice, and Tomoki looked away, as if regretting his mistake, and shook his head, putting his hand on his forehead.
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