Source
https://kakuyomu.jp/works/16817330662140414210/episodes/16817330663588992777
[Masatoshi broke up with Kisaki. It was something I had been waiting for. While consoling him, I thought it might be a chance somewhere.]
[We went out for the first time in a long time. Since I knew Masatoshi so well, it was easy for me to win the game of rock-paper-scissors. I was glad to see that he didn’t seem to have changed.]
[We talked about books. I tried to be bold and say I love you on the phone. My heart was racing for a while.]
I pulled out my diary from when I first got involved with Masatoshi. I pulled it out and looked at it.
When I was told to keep my distance from him, I was afraid I would embarrass him. To be honest, it’s not something I can swallow. I thought I would be happier if I stayed involved with him.
But Masatoshi said differently. What I’ve been doing, what I thought was the right thing, is crumbling out of nowhere. I was told to try to remain calm.
Wasn’t I trying to stay calm? Wasn’t I doing what I always do? Was I looking at myself through colored glasses?
When I feel like I am losing sight of myself, one way is to turn to the diary. By putting it in writing, the words will leave you. Over time, they gradually become closer and closer to the words of others.
Until this time, it is still not a problem.
[Preparations for the festival. I am filling the role of the haunted house. I’m secretly working on the setting to make it more realistic.]
[On the day of the festival, I hypnotized Masatoshi. I did it because I wanted him to get comfortable. He seemed to feel good, so I’m glad I did it.]
[I have to destroy Kisaki Saki. I’ve thought this before, but I think it even more strongly. The moment you do something terrible to Masatoshi, it’s over]
[I have information on Kisaki Saki. I will crush her. Every time I send her an anonymous message, I picture her suffering.]
It’s getting very recent.
[I’m going to destroy Kisaki Saki. It’s my job to punish her. I’m not going to back down and I’m determined to be thorough.]
[How far should I go? It is the culmination of all my experiences so far. The moment you make me your enemy, you are finished.]
[I will crush you. Thoroughly. I will go on and on until I’m satisfied.]
This is the end of the diary.
The latter half is remarkable. It is clear that my resentment toward the woman is growing day by day. Although I don’t have much to do with it, I thought it was for Masatoshi’s sake.
I even made threats by message, albeit anonymously. I was fully prepared for this.
But Masatoshi’s expression was not good. He even asked me to keep my distance from him.
Thinking back, I was thinking about destroying her as much as or more than Masatoshi. I spent most of my free time trying to find out all the private information I could about her.
Was that really the way love should be? Is it right to continue punishing Kisaki Saki with the intensity I have now?
Of course there is a part of me that cries out she should be punished. The punishment should be given to the worst of women. As long as there is no one to execute it, I should be in charge.
There is also the part of me that thinks that it can be stopped. Does Masatoshi want it? As in the past, there is no need to remove it or it will interfere with my daily life. By being with me, his mental stability is being restored.
Yes, the situation is different from before.
Masatoshi and that woman, who don’t share the same values, are nothing to worry about as long as they keep their distance.
It’s just my own idea that she should be punished for cheating on him.
“Should I stop……?”
In order to get along with Masatoshi again, I have no choice but to improve “something”. If my sense of justice has led to excessive sanctions, I need to change it. Even if it is unwilling.
What I must not do wrong is, above all, to spend time with Masatoshi. If I abandon my relationship with Masatoshi in order to judge an infuriating woman, it would be a complete disaster.
I am Masatoshi and Masatoshi is me.
If that is the case, the right thing for me to do is to do what Masatoshi really wants me to do.
Perhaps Kisaki Saki is about to snap. There is no need to push her any further.
All I ask for is one thing, an apology.
I’m going to settle things here. And then I’ll get my relationship with Masatoshi back on track. That’s what I should do.
No more anonymous accusations.
Let’s make a phone call.
I tried three times, but she never picked up the phone. She must be scared. I’d driven her that far.
[Please pick up. Otherwise, you know.]
Again, it was in the form of a threat, but I had no choice. I didn’t need any more threats, this was the last one.
After three more attempts, the connection was finally made.
[Who are you? Who do you think you are, threatening me, making me suffer?]
“I was just blinded by your insolence.”
[A woman? Ah, you envied me. I’m sorry, I’m a very popular girl, okay?]
“You don’t understand anything. That’s not where my anger is directed.”
[Then what?]
“I’m going to turn on the camera. I’ll tell you when I do.”
[F-fine ! Whatever you say.]
She did as she was told. Kisaki turned on the camera.
She looked terrible. Her self-proclaimed beautiful appearance was in disarray. Her room and body were in shambles.
“Hello.”
[Eek.]
I laughed. I could see my own face in the reflection, but it looked pretty bad. I couldn’t control my anger. I was less than three years old, an amateur.
[Aaahhh, you–]
“Long time no see, Masatoshi’s ex-girlfriend.”
Her mouth won’t stop fluttering. Apparently it’s a habit. She had the same reaction when I revealed the fact that she was a slut. The reaction seems to be poor.
[I remember now, Nagai kun’s childhood friend. How dare you threaten me ! As you can see, my body is in shreds !]
“In shreds, you say? So?”
[……Ha?]
“I bet you were hoping for some words of comfort. I won’t do that. I’m not like those people who kept you in a greenhouse and incubated you.”
[Y-you.]
Considering this woman’s history, she must have lived a life without losing.
She is used to beating people up, but she is not the type to fight back. She has hardly ever been hit, and she probably thinks she is in a safe zone.
She is on a higher level than others and may think I am incapacitated.
Pride. As an invincible person with no regrets, I have the power to nullify that woman’s words and illusions.
“I have only one request. I want you to apologize to Masatoshi.”
[Huh, you’ve got to be kidding me. I’m not a bad person. I’m always right.]
One of the straps inside of me was removed.
–She’s hopeless.
“You seem to have forgotten your position, Kisaki Saki. 16 years old. Born on March 9th. Father divorced when you were young. Blood type B. You were an only child. High school is within an hour’s drive, and there is a forest behind your house. At one time, you had ten consecutive relationships. The number of exes you’ve had can’t be contained in fingers and toes. Your favorite color is pink, which is why your writing utensils are also solidly the same color. The same goes for your lunch box. You love pickled plums, and always have them in your lunch. Your favorite hairdresser is–“
Kisaki began to shake and tremble as I repeated the words.
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