By the time you think you’ve done it, it’s usually too late.

Masatoshi’s consciousness has not yet returned. It takes time for him to come back to this world once he has been tapped on the head.

While I was trying to bring him back, I held a self-reflection meeting in my head.

Hypnotizing Masatoshi was just a passing thought. I wanted to see how well my training had worked.

As you can see, it was a great success. Masatoshi is a distorted boy, but he is pure and innocent at heart. He is the type that is easily brainwashed.

Knock, knock, knock. Three consecutive hits on the head is not only easy to do, but also an action that is not so latent in daily life. It is a good selection.

I don’t want the switch in Masatoshi to be turned on often in the middle of our daily lives.

What else is needed as an element is to make the switch on faster and deeper when it is turned on.

Tapping on the head is a suitable expression of my motherhood. It’s a genius idea on my part.

“But maybe I overdid it…….”

I have reflected on that. I shouldn’t use head tapping too much just because it’s effective.

It is not half as addictive. I felt that Masatoshi had become my [thing] more than ever.

However, he is only a [thing]. He is the ultimate form of a human being who has discarded the human heart. If I go to this extreme, a doll made in the likeness of Masatoshi would suffice.

Do I love Masatoshi? Is this enough? The more I move forward, the more I hear a sad cry from the depths of my heart.

……I must not do this. Considering all the time I have devoted to Masatoshi, the answer should be obvious.

I love Masatoshi as Masatoshi. That’s all.

“The preparations for that are still ongoing.”

I take out my phone. It is not the one I usually use, but a spare one. I use it when I want to contact someone without knowing it was me.

“No reply, I guess…….”

I had been in touch with Kisaki Saki through a messaging app.

Anonymous, of course. The purpose is to poison her mind.

[I know you.]

That was the first message I sent under the name Anonymous X.

It was actually after the festival.

[The guy you’re dating is Kisaragi Hikaru, Satoshi Yoshiaki—“

Next, I sent the name of her boyfriends. This was the result of a thorough search. I will never forget the thrill I felt when I typed it all in with my own hands.

[Be careful how you act.]

Before I could send the third sentence, the message was read. I guessed it was a bad idea.

[Who are you? Are you an acquaintance? What do you want?]

The response was immediate. As soon as I sent the third sentence, it was like that.

It must have been terrifying. Invisible enemies are also troublesome. You get caught up in unnecessary speculation, and you start to feel the stares that aren’t there. In my experience, they are quite effective in chipping away at the normal psyche.

[Let’s just say, I’m not on your side.]

[Please don’t send me strange messages.]

[If you reject my calls, you might as well do it with the knowledge that all of your misdeeds will be exposed to the public.]

Photo attached. I took it secretly. To a stranger, it would be merely an everyday scene.

From Kisaki Saki’s point of view, it is the worst picture of all, making it clear that she is being monitored.

[I won’t reject the call.]

[Wise decision.]

Here I decided to take a break.

[This roundabout measure is being taken for a very important purpose.]

[What purpose?]

[To improve your behavior, that’s all. I want you to show me what I consider to be a proper attitude. You have two weeks. If there is no improvement, I will take strong measures.]

[Is that a threat?]

[No. I don’t want to be rough with you. Let’s be friendly. I will only take strong measures when I am forced to do so.]

A long conversation ensued. To tell the truth, I was too excited. I was overflowing with joy at finally being able to move. No, that’s not good.

[Okay. I’ll do what I can.]

From that day on, my education on Kisaki Saki began.

I tracked down ers location, took pictures, and sent them to her. I would check on her daily progress. A little more work.

She did any of these things.

And don’t forget the silent phone calls twice a day. Even if I did only this, I think the mental damage would be enough. But I think this might be too much for Kisaki Saki, who has a thick skin.

There are many children whom I have educated. The leader of the group who picked a fight with Masatoshi is a memorable one. The way he begged for forgiveness was beautiful, revealing his true nature.

What kind of reaction would Kisaki Saki have?

I tried to find out from Masatoshi, but he did not say anything. Did he think it was unnecessary, or was he reluctant to say anything, or was there no damage?

Since I haven’t heard it, I can’t confirm the answer. Still, I can guess that there was probably no damage.

I hope you are shaking your body. I want you to be touched by malice from whom you do not know. I want you to be troubled and distressed and grieve because of the existence of someone who does not take pleasure in you—.

I am filled with filthy desire. It is not beautiful just to seek.

I’m doing this for Masatoshi. It is dirty work for a good cause. I can only move because I can hope that there is a transparent love waiting for me at the end of my continuous seeking.

That is how it has always been. I don’t want to dirty Masatoshi’s hands, and I want to get closer to his core. I have been, am, and will continue to be motivated by this single-mindedness.

I will have to accept the punishment sooner or later.

At the very least, Kisaki Saki comes first. I can’t accept the crime until I have brought her down to the depths of despair.

For the sins I have borne and committed, I will do my best.

Today, too, I will live for Masatoshi–.


“Good morning, Masatoshi?”

“Oh, Rika. Rika.”

For a moment, there was a gesture as if he was frightened of something. I wonder if I was that tinted black. I wonder if the demons I’ve been taming in my heart have come out too much.

“I’m not afraid of anything anymore.”

“What’s the matter with you all of a sudden?”

“Nothing. I’m just talking to myself.”

“Then fine.”

I watched Masatoshi as he stood up and slowly straightened his back.

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