I, Hakariya Hakari, have been working harder on my job than ever before in my life.

I have a different power these days, to say the least.

My throat opens differently when I sing the assigned songs, and I can memorize the choreography after seeing it only once, as if I had never seen it before.

My skin tone, which was always good, is so good that every time I wake up in the morning, I think I could be in a commercial if I keep this up ! I went to show it to Sasaki san and she agree.

Even though I go to her every day to show it to her.

I don’t know much about it because I’m stupid and can’t study well, but it seems that human beings are controlled by hormones after all.

The other day, a gay makeup artist who is known as a love master asked me, [Why are you so sparkly these days, Hakari chan?] I answered, [I’m happy because I have someone I like right now.]

I didn’t say it was a boyfriend. I blurted that part out.

Then he said, [Then you’re getting dopamine. It makes you motivated and aggressive. Love is the most powerful thing〜]

That’s right.

Love is the strongest.

A few weeks have passed since I met Yukimi kun.

I was so full of energy that I couldn’t remember who I was before.

Last time I went on a date with Yukimi kun for the first time, we talked about many things.

We had so much fun that it was hard for me to date in secret, and I even said some unintentionally negative things.

I told him that I was too happy to be an idol in the countryside, where I was just a pretty, cute girl who was pampered and admired.

At that time, Yukimi kun said.

[Even so, many people now have high expectations for the accounting firm, and there are also people working for the accounting firm, right?]

[And the amount of support a Hakariya gets is not the amount of support a normal person would get. That’s your value, that’s your strength.]

[You should really try being pampered for a few rounds of your life. You might start to enjoy it.]

[If you get really sick of it, you can quit.]

I have to admit that I wasn’t too convinced by those words.

I wanted to be pampered by Yukimi kun more than by the cheers of the fans.

But Yukimi kun’s words stayed with me, and from the next day I gradually changed my ways.

I listen to Yukimi kun’s words.

At first I didn’t know how to do it, so I consulted with Kyoko.

Kyoko looked both surprised and impressed, but gave me some simple advice.

I did as she told me and started greeting people a little more cheerfully than usual.

I could see that just by doing that, the evaluation of the people around me changed completely.

I think the staff around me were doing a good enough job for me to begin with, but by asking my name and communicating with them, I could see in their hands that they were working with even more enthusiasm.

Yukimi kun is right.

I was actually starting to enjoy my job.


Today is the first hand-off since I changed my mindset that way.

I’m going to give the people who bought our CDs a special offer and talk to them a little bit.

I don’t know the details, but I think it’s probably five to ten seconds per CD.

Some people buy 10 CDs and stay for more than a minute.

In the past, I was said to be rather salty at the handover events.

I would hand over the gift and smile thinly.

If someone talks to me, I just smile lightly and reply.

After dealing with hundreds of people in a monotonous manner, I started to lose consciousness in the middle of the day.

I think I smiled less and less in the latter half of the day.

But I was fine with that.

Everyone came to see my beautiful and pretty face, I thought.

But today, I’m trying to change my mind.

“Hakari chan ! You’re so cute ! How are you?”

“I’m fine. What’s your name?”

“……Eh !? M-my name is Ishimatsu ! !”

“Perhaps I might have forgotten it, Ishimatsu san. Thank you for coming, Ishimatsu san.”

I look into the eyes of my fan and smile.

“I could die now……………….”

The fan, about to faint with satisfaction, is peeled off and taken away by the staff as the time has come.

Hmmm, this is getting fun.

Are you that happy to have a conversation with me?

I then proceeded to respond with a lot more effort than I usually put into it.

After about two hours, I noticed that the line, which usually shows an end in sight, showed no sign of it at all.

“Sasaki san, aren’t there a lot of people here today?”

I asked the manager, who had gone somewhere earlier.

“Hakari, this is your power. Today’s Hakari is so attractive that we are getting a lot of repeat customers and new fans. I am…..impressed.”

Eh, Sasaki san looks impressed. I’m a little scared of her eyes.

“But I don’t think I can do it anymore…….I’m tired…….”

“What are you talking about? I saw Yukimi kun at the venue just now.

“Is that so ! I’m so happy……he’s really here…….”

I’m really happy.

Yukimi kun said he would come to see the show today instead of the date he couldn’t come last time.

I thought it was 50/50 whether he would come or not since he stopped replying to RINE.

I’m glad.

I’ve been working hard lately.

Watch me.


A few more hours passed from there, and I was so tired that I didn’t know what I was talking about anymore.

Still, I do my best to look them in the eye, be interested, and meet their expectations.

I’m tired, but I still feel like I can go on.

I guess this is what runner’s high feels like.

I look around and wonder how the venue was filled with such enthusiasm.

I wonder if these people will come to the next show.

I suddenly feel ashamed of myself.

I was just doing what I was told to do.

I’m going to give it my all as an idol, I think now.

This, too.

It’s thanks to you, Yukimi kun.

I finally found my boyfriend a little further away from the booth.

Yukimi kun is also looking straight at me.

He’s wearing one of my T-shirts.

My boyfriend is the best.

I’ve worked hard all day and Yukimi kun came to see me.

I felt a mixture of various feelings of accomplishment, and naturally began to cry.

I stare at Yukimi kun with a single-minded, even divine look on my face.

The staff around us gathered around me, looking worried.

I’m sorry, I just want to watch him for a little while longer.

As I was thinking that, I saw a large male fan in front of me.

He is out of breath.

I look at him and think that it’ll be Yukimi kun after this.


Hm, is this guy the producer’s son……?

From there, my vision was in slow motion.

The man in front of me pulled out a gleaming blade from his backpack.

He swung it at me and tried to cut me.

I closed my eyes.

When I opened them, I saw the man lying on the ground, Yukimi kun holding him back.

There were screams and shouts from the staff.

Some people call out his name, Kadota Akira.

I heard several voices yelling that it was a bomb.

I felt the angry shouts echoing and spreading throughout the hall.

People, crowded together as if they were rushing toward each other, trying to escape somewhere.

While everyone was trying to escape in their own way, Yukimi kun was the only one who said.

There is no bomb, please calm down.

I was relieved to hear that, but the people around me were not.

The flood of people pushing in pushed down the walls of my temporary booth.

I looked at Yukimi kun as I felt the wall slowly collapse.

Holding Kadota Akira down, Yukimi kun reached for me.

It was too far away to reach.

Still, I continued to stare at Yukimi kun.

Now I wonder if I had a hunch that this would be the last time I would see Yukimi kun.

I was caught in a collapsing wall and lost consciousness.



When I woke up, I was in a white room.

I heard a regular electronic beep.

A hospital room, I thought.

“Hakari, thank God. I’m so glad.”

Sasaki san took my hand in hers.

I begin to move my body with trepidation.

My right hand, my left hand, they move.

My legs also move.

But still.

“There is no life-threatening injury. Brain CT showed no problems. Thank goodness.”

“……Sasaki sna.”

Still, I had to ask.

“Why can’t I open my left eye?

“……! !”

Sasaki san hugs me silently with tears in her eyes.

Oh, no.

I fearfully touch the left side of my face.

It was wrapped in bandages.

“I’ll go get a doctor.”

Sasaki san left.

I was left alone and removed the bandage myself.

“Hakari chan, you can’t do that.”

I was not alone.

“Kyoko, please. My face is important to me. You know that, don’t you?”

“Hakari chan……”

As a fellow idol, Kyoko understood.

She doesn’t try to stop me any further.

I remove the bandage and touch it.

There is a vertical line down the left side of my face, passing over her eye and cutting it exactly in half.

The stitches are bumpy.

I wonder if the glass in the booth has pierced it.


There’s also a horizontal line roughly under my eye.

It didn’t hurt at all, but it was kind of funny.


I imagine my face with a big cross-shaped scar.

I don’t dare look in the mirror.

The doctor said he wasn’t sure yet, but he thought my eyeball would be fine.

I can’t open my eye yet, but I’m glad it’s still there.

Tears started to well up from my right eye, which was still intact.

“Kyoko, can you leave me alone for a minute? Also, I just need you to take my phone.”


Kyoko, you don’t have to be so sad.

After Kyoko leaves, I think.

I’ve been building up my self-worth with this beautiful face.

Today is the end of that.

For now, there is someone I need to tell.

I make a call.


“Hello, this is Hakari.”


His voice was gentle. I liked his voice.

“There’s nothing wrong with my body, but I’m left with a big scar on my face.”

“Hakariya. I couldn’t help you…….”

No, don’t apologize.

“It’s okay. You stopped him from stabbing me with the knife. Thank you for saving my life.”

I really mean that.


Oh, no. Talking makes my resolve waver.

“Yukimi kun, I have a favor to ask you.”

“I’ll make anything come true.”

Hahaha. That’s cool. Seriously, I love him.

Then make it come true.

Thank you for dating a girl with only a face like mine until now.

I’ve been happy.

“Please, break up with me.”

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7 months ago

“I don’t think, I will”