Source
https://kakuyomu.jp/works/16818023212795389552/episodes/16818093073703829854
On my way to and from school. I always listen to music.
[Sunlight Hope] songs are really good. It lifts my spirits even on a Monday morning like today. I’ve been enjoying school lately.
“……-kun?
It’s great that my idol goes to the same school. Everything is already good.
The best thing is that I can see my favorite idol even during the hiatus.
To be honest, I thought Kusunoki was not well….not to say that she was sick for some reason.
“……to kun?”
Maybe if she hadn’t transferred to this school,……I would have taken a day off from school to do some fan work too. Yeah. As expected, that is bad.
No, it’s dangerous at this point. The vector of danger is different.
“……Yukito kun?”
See, I can even hear my idol calling me by name. Isn’t it the best ..?
“Yukito kun !”
“Kwawadkoaaowp”
Idol !? Why is my idol here !? Why am I being pinched on the shoulder !? Heaven !? This must be it !?
“Y-Yukito kun !? I’m sorry !? I didn’t think you notice.”
“Ah, no, um, no, um, I mean, which one?”
Crap. My brain can’t keep up with processing.
Kaname…..he’s away at morning practice for club activities.
“…W-wait a minute. I need to calm down.”
“Uh-huh.”
Deep breaths—-Eh? Take a deep breath here? Isn’t it a little weird? Am I breathing the same air as my idol?
“W-what’s wrong?”
“….I was wondering if it’s okay to breathe.”
“Obviously !? You’ll die if you don’t !?”
I get permission and take a deep breath. Oh no. It smells so good. My blood pressure is probably around 300 right now. I’m gonna die.
However, after taking a deep breath, my blood pressure calmed down a little. I think it dropped to about 250.
“Then again–good morning, Yukito kun.”
“…..G-good-good morning, Kusunoki.”
I didn’t expect my idol to greet me in the morning.
“E-erm. How can I help you?”
“No, I just saw you. But can’t you do something about the way you talk?”
“The way…I talk?”
“Like that. Yukito kun, why do you only use honorific language to me? ”
Gulp.
“Ah, no. That’s. Kaname told me that the way I speak doesn’t seem too coercive, so I should use honorifics for the time being.”
“I see. I’m sure you’ll think I’m a timid child or something.”
Ah, that’s what I thought. Yeah. Let’s continue to use honorific language.
“But I want you to talk to me casually. I feel like we can get along better that way.”
“Goddess ……? Goddess it is.”
“I’m a person.”
But if I am told to do so by my most favorite idol, that’s what a fan is supposed to do. I’ll be a devil or whatever.
“But, okay. I’ll use this tone from now on.”
“Yeah, thanks.”
Well, just like before, there aren’t that many opportunities to talk. Kusunoki talks to quite a lot of people, so it’s not like I stood out or anything. Before that, I’m a very conspicuous person.
“Then let’s go to school together !”
“This is an idol’s communicative power…..awesome.”
It’s amazing to be able to talk to classmates of the opposite sex on the way to school. Like going to school together.
I’m a rather shy person, if I do say so myself. I often talk to Kaname, but not much to the other students.
“It’s because you’re easy to talk to, Yukito kun.”
“Ack.”
“Fufu, you’re a little different from other people, Yukito kun. On the other hand, I feel like it’s easier to talk to you if you show off your goodwill this much.”
……Is that what it’s about? I thought. That’s it.
“Does it feel like you’re interacting with fans normally?”
“Hmmm. Close, but not quite.”
“Hm? Is that so?”
Kusunoki—I think, she lets out a voice like a celestial maiden. I want to record it and use it as background music for sleep.
“…I don’t think it’s a good idea to do something like this often. Fans are different from one another.”
“Ah. I see.”
Oh, that. That’s what I mean when I say troublesome otaku, but there are also fans who are not sensitive.
There are people who wait for her to come out of the venue, or who make sexually harassing comments in replies on social media. I don’t want to call them fans though.
“From that point of view, I think Yukito kun is a fan who is quite approachable. Even when you say that you love me…I can tell that you are serious, or that it just leaked out.”
“I’m very sorry about that.”
As expected, I would like to refrain from saying it in front of her.
“No, I’m happy. It’s an honest answer.”
“…..I’m glad to hear you say so.”
Okay. It was bearable. Good luck to me. I’ll only say that in front of the screen,
“That’s right. There are a lot of things I want to ask Yukito kun.”
“Hm? What is it?”
“I’d like to know about the most memorable live performance or stream.”
“……Is that okay? It’s gonna be long, you know?”
Should I talk fast like a nerd?
I got into trouble for it once in middle school, and the class decided I wasn’t allowed to talk about [Suh].
“Of course ! I love [Suh] too !”
“Okay, then—“
And so, the school hours became a strange time to talk about [Suh] to a member of [Suh].
It was a strange time—but Kusunoki was a very good listener, and it was a fun time.
◆◇◆◇◆
A strong wind was blowing.
She was on the roof of the school, a place that used to be allowed but is now not supposed to be entered by students.
“……Yukito kun,he sounded like he was having a good time.”
In the corner of the rooftop, she was sitting on the bench and burying her face. The smartphone in her hand was constantly displaying notifications.
“….I’ll have to change my e-mail address again.”
The text on the screen made her want to cover her eyes.
[I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you.]
[Die.]
[Ugly idol. I bet you’re tradingsexual favor anyway.”
[Why are you still alive? Hey, I hope you die soon.]
“…I guess it’s better to do what Manager san says after all.”
A drop fell onto that clear skin.
Identification of email address. And this wasn’t the first time this incident of harassment had occurred.
It’s not just specific…the number of people who know this email address is quite limited.
In other words, there is someone close to her who thinks less of her.
She was tormented by this fact.
“What should I do?”
A word floated in her head. But she can’t do that here, where the place is covered by a sturdy fence.
She knew that if she did that, he would be sad.
“……Yukito kun.”
Unconsciously, Kusunoki was calling his name.
In order to prevent scandal and evil thoughts, she talked to various students, both male and female. In the midst of all this, she met a big fan of [Sunlight Hope].
At first, she felt scared. She was worried that if he asked her why she was on hiatus.
But he never asked her,……on the contrary, he never meddled.
He was one of those students that Kusunoki found easy to deal with.
We talked this morning, and this happened just as I was trying to get back on my feet.
I want to make a quick comeback and make fans like him happy.
I feel sorry for the trouble I caused to so many people by taking a break.
I felt irritated with myself for stopping even though I had promised my friends that I would absolutely take the top spot.
“……”
The mixture of these feelings dripped down her cheeks. She doesn’t want to speak. She doesn’t want to let it out.
Don’t ask for help. I am the one who decided to take this path.
She blames herself and does not notice the sound of the heavy door opening. And then—
“……Ku-Kusunoki?”
She finally noticed when he called out to her and looked up.
She thought it was an auditory hallucination, but–no. There was a male fan who should not be there.
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