Source
https://kakuyomu.jp/works/16818093093152263860/episodes/16818622170980597725
“My story?”
Asahina nodded quietly from under the futon. She looked sleepy, but she forced her eyelids open and looked at me.
“I don’t think my story is interesting.”
“I still want to hear it. You have a younger sister, right, Ryo?”
“Yeah, she’s in the second year of junior high school.”
“I bet she’s cute…”
“No, she’s really cheeky.”
“Really? That’s surprising.”
I talked about my life little by little. Come to think of it, I don’t think I’ve ever talked about this kind of thing with Asahina before.
“What do Ryo-kun’s parents do?”
“They’re both regular company employees. They both work, so I’ve always taken care of my sister.”
“Ryo-kun is like an older brother, isn’t he?”
“As for Asahina’s parents…”
I almost asked, “What did Asahina’s parents do?” Asahina’s family seems complicated. From what I heard earlier, they seem to be retired (?). Is this really something I should be asking about?
“Don’t worry about it. My parents were also in the industry.”
Oh, she saw right through me. Asahina answered my question casually.
“In the industry?”
“My father was a photographer, and my mother was a fashion model.”
“Ugh, that’s so different from my parents…”
“I don’t think so.”
Asahina continued talking while looking at the ceiling of the room.
“My mother wasn’t very successful. It’s a tough world. So she had high expectations for me. She always praised me, saying, ‘Toka is amazing, Toka has talent.’ So I worked really hard.”
“…I see.”
“I used to cry while practicing acting. I couldn’t memorize the script either.”
Every word she spoke conveyed the extraordinary hardships she had endured. While I was a child playing around with snot running down my nose, Asahina must have been making tremendous efforts.
“How did you hurt your knee, Ryo kun?”
She brought the conversation back to me. After hearing Asahina’s story, it felt embarrassing in many ways to talk about myself.
“…It was in middle school…”
After that preface, I carefully chose my words as if recalling the past. Asahina pulled the blanket up to her mouth and stared intently at me.
“I joined the basketball team in middle school. At first, I only joined because my friends invited me, and I had no motivation at all. It was harder than I expected! Every day, I was drenched in sweat, yelled at, and so sore I couldn’t even climb the stairs.”
Asahina nodded as she listened to my story.
“One day, I ended up playing in a game. But because of my bad pass, we lost.”
Even now, thinking about it makes my heart race a little. The atmosphere at that moment. The silence. The stares piercing my back.
“Everyone was silent. The coach didn’t say anything either. On the way home, walking alone, I started wondering why I was even there.”
Asahina listens to my story with a serious expression. I wish she’d show that face during class instead.
“But that night, my clubmates came to my house. I was really surprised. They rang my doorbell over and over. No one thought I was at fault. They brought ice cream and told me to come to club activities tomorrow.”
“Everyone is so kind.”
“Yeah, so I decided to change my mindset and try harder. I wanted to try harder because everyone was there for me. But I think I pushed myself too hard.”
“You tried too hard?”
“I tried too hard in practice and got injured.”
When I said that, Asahina’s eyes widened slightly. Her thin eyelashes twitched.
“Did it hurt…?”
Her voice sounded as if she was concerned about my heart at that time, rather than my current physical condition.
“Yeah, well… a little. I tore my knee ligament. The doctor told me to rest for a while, but I just couldn’t stop practicing, so I pushed myself—”
I stopped there. The anxiety I felt back then. Afraid of being left behind, I pushed myself to the limit. It wasn’t anyone else’s fault. I just couldn’t be kind to myself.
“In the end, it got worse, and I couldn’t play in the game.”
“You’re an idiot…”
“Yeah, but I stayed with the club until the end as a manager. It was frustrating, but I wanted to be there for everyone. I wanted to be part of the team.”
“…”
“…That’s how my middle school days were, I guess. I think I was just an ordinary student.”
After saying that, I smiled a little. Compared to Asahina, it feels like such a small story.
“…Ryo-kun and I might be similar.”
“Huh? In what way!?”
“I also tried to keep going because everyone was there. I always thought I had to smile. I couldn’t show my weakness in front of the people who were cheering me on. I felt like I had to be someone’s ‘ideal Asahina Toka.’”
My heart ached. The image of Asahina Toka, who had been holding her breath under everyone’s expectations, flashed before my eyes.
Thinking about how such a girl who had worked so hard would be labeled a “failure” by society… it made me feel incredibly sad.
“But one day, I reached my limit…”
I searched for words, but none came to mind. All I could do was gently hold Asahina’s hand back.
“Asahina, that’s enough.”
“…I want to know more about you, Ryo kun.”
“…Yeah, I want to know more about you too.”
“That’s… nice… suu… suu…”
Perhaps she had reached her limit, Asahina fell asleep.
Our hands were still clasped together… But I was so happy that she had opened up to me like that.
“Good night, Asahina.”
I almost reached out to touch her head. That wouldn’t be right.
“Umm…”
With a warm heart, I watched over Asahina, and soon I felt sleepy myself. Maybe I’ll close my eyes for a bit too…
“Hm…?”
I woke up feeling groggy.
Oh no! Two hours had passed since then! I had completely fallen asleep. My body hurt from sleeping in an awkward position. My hands had been holding Asahina’s the whole time I was asleep, and they were soaked with sweat.
“I need to change the towel!”
I forcefully let go of her hand and squeeze out the towel on Asahina’s forehead. Her complexion doesn’t look too bad.
I woke her up early in the morning and called her goodnight at night, so maybe she just didn’t get enough sleep. Besides, she’s been trying not to fall asleep in class lately.
“…I wonder what she would have done today if I hadn’t been there.”
Thinking that made me shudder. She must have been having a hard time alone.
“Ryo-kun…”
“Oh, sorry. Did I wake you up?”
“No…”
Asahina opened her eyelids slightly and looked at me blankly. Her cheeks were still a little red, so maybe her fever hadn’t completely gone down yet.
“The sweat feels gross…”
“Oh, do you want to change clothes? If so, I’ll go outside!”
“Help me change…”
“I told you it’s impossible! You always joke around like that!”
“But today, I really need your help…”
“Huh?”
“Here”
Saying that, Asahina started taking off her usual sweatshirt!
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