Source
https://kakuyomu.jp/works/16818093083511177921/episodes/16818093089134517644
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▼Matsumura Hina Point of View ▼
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Today is the long-awaited day to play with Hikaru.
I wake up earlier than usual and get ready with all my energy.
I picked out my clothes, put on my makeup, and did my hair …… so I could already call it a “date”.
While I was busily preparing like that, Sakine woke up.
“Sakine, good morning. Sorry, it’s been noisy since this morning.”
“Good morning, …….”
With this greeting, Sakine seemed a little less energetic than usual, but it was probably because it was earlier than usual.
“What do you want to eat?”
“. …… onee chan….. my head is spinning,……”
The moment Sakine’s feeble voice reached my ears, I immediately put my hand on her forehead.
it’s hot. It’s obviously not a normal temperature.
“You must have a fever!?”
I hurriedly picked up Sakine and took her to the futon to put her to sleep.
“Sakine, are you all right? Lie down on the futon. I’ll be right back with some water and a cold towel!”
I quickly prepared for her as I put her to sleep.
As soon as I put the cold towel on her forehead, she finally seemed to calm down a little.
“Thanks……onee chan…….”
The cold towel on her sweaty forehead may have had some effect, and Sakine expresses her gratitude in a faint voice.
“Don’t worry, Sakine, don’t worry. Nee chan will be with you all the way today!”
But the moment I checked Sakine’s thermometer, I gulped.
38.7 degrees Celsius. This might not be just a cold.
I left Sakine’s room and took a deep breath.
(I had a …… date today. ……)
I stifle the words that went to my throat.
I had been looking forward to this date with Hikaru for a few weeks now, but since my mom isn’t here today, I have to take care of Sakine.
Maybe the kind Hikaru will forgive me if I tell him the reason.
I always rely on his kindness like that.
I picked up my phone and called Hikaru.
“Hello?”
“Hello, Hikaru? Sorry, we have a date today. ……”
“What’s wrong?”
Hikaru’s voice over the phone was as calm as ever.
“Sakine, you know, she suddenly got a fever and I have to take …… care of her, so I don’t think I’ll be able to …… go… today. …….”
When I told him that, after a short pause, he answered gently
“I see, then it can’t be helped. Please take a good look at Sakune-chan. Shall I buy something?”
I feel a little lighter in my heart at those words. Hikaru is kind.
He is the one who can take care of my situation like this.
But I don’t want to rely on his kindness all the time.
“No, I’m fine. It would be bad if you get sick, so I’ll just take your feelings.”
“I understand. Please don’t push yourself too hard Hina.”
“Yeah. I’m really sorry. I was looking forward to it…”
“I was looking forward to it too, but it’s not something Hina should apologize for. Good luck taking care of Sakine-chan.”
After I hung up the phone, I let out a big breath.
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After nursing her for a while and past noon, Sakine finally seemed to have fallen into a shallow sleep.
Perhaps because of her high body temperature, she was having trouble sleeping and sweat was floating on her forehead.
(Maybe some porridge or potassium would help a little. ……)
After checking the fridge, I let out a small sigh.
Considering what I have for the night, I can’t help myself if I don’t go shopping
“I’m going to go shopping for a bit, Sakine. I’ll be back soon, so go back to sleep while I’m gone.”
I held Sakine’s small hand and smiled to reassure her.
A little before evening, the shopping street was a little crowded with housewives.
I make my way through the crowd and quickly gather up the things I need.
(If I don’t go home soon, Sakine will worry about me. ……)
When I finished the checkout and left the store, the setting sun was just beginning to turn orange.
It was then that I saw something familiar out of the corner of my eye.
I saw a familiar figure behind me out of the corner of my eye.
–Hikaru?
I stared at it, and there was no doubt in my mind’s eye that I was looking at Hikaru.
Next to him was a woman with long black hair pulled back into a ponytail — Nishihara Natsuki.
The two seemed to be talking about something as they walked side by side. Natsuki chan made some kind of joke, and Hikaru was laughing happily.
(Why ……?)
My feet naturally stopped there. I wondered if I should call out to them, but I just couldn’t speak.
The two did not seem to notice me, and they walked slowly, conversing happily.
They were walking away from me gradually.
“….. lies, right?”
I was so surprised that I could not believe it.
I know it in my head. Hikaru isn’t that kind of person, and Natsuki-chan is probably just a coincidence.
But today was the date I had promised to go on a date with.
(I wonder if he doesn’t care about me anymore ……)
Anxiety and sadness swept over me, and my heart was inexplicably buzzing.
All the way home, I fought with my feelings.
Should I ask Hikaru directly, or should I just pretend that nothing had happened?
(But if I ask him this, it’s as if I’m doubting him. ……)
On the other hand, it was painful to keep silent.
I want to believe him, but I can’t get the scene from earlier out of my head.
Returning to the front door, I quietly peeked into Sakine’s room to find her still asleep.
I was relieved, but my heart was not at all at ease.
After making porridge for Sakine and making sure she regained some of her energy, I sat alone in the living room.
In my hand, I had the chat screen of the messaging app with Hikaru open.
There was a message from Hikaru, sent about the time I got home, “Sakine-chan, is she feeling better?”
I thought about sending him a message saying, “She calmed down a lot,” but I just couldn’t bring myself to send it.
The memory of his smiling face as he walked with Natsuki chan was so painful that I couldn’t stop thinking about it.
“…. what am I going to do?”
In the quiet room, I asked myself a question that no one could hear.
I want to believe.
But I’m worried.
I hate myself for not believing him.
I gently opened the door of the bedroom where Sakine was sleeping and looked at her peaceful sleeping face.
“I decided to be strong. ……”
That night, with the moonlight shining through the window, I was quietly clearing my mind as I gazed at Sakine’s sleeping face.
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