Episode 3 – The Melancholy of Oishi Karen (1)

My name is Oishi Karen.

I am a second-year student at Aozora Academy High School.

I am not a very outgoing person, but rather shy and reserved.

Wanting to change my lack of confidence and gloomy personality, I started paying attention to fashion and makeup when I became a high school student.

And what do you know, I started hanging out with girls who were the opposite of me—the outgoing type.

[Karen, you’re so cute! How did you get such fair skin?]

[Your hair is so black and beautiful, just like an idol’s…look ! You have an angelic halo !}  

[You’re the kind of high school girl who would fit right in on Omotesando.]

There are a lot of cute girls around me.  

Some of them even work as magazine models.  

Hanging out with these flashy girls makes me feel like I’ve entered a whole new world that I’ve never experienced before.

I’ve never broken curfew before, but now I do it without a second thought.  

I’ve even been dragged to a mixer with boys from other schools.  

[Karen chan, would you like to go out with me sometime?]

[I have a vacation home, so let’s all go on a trip together !] 

[At least give me your contact info ! You’re so guarded, Karen chan !]

….I’m not into guys who act like that.

They clearly approach me with ulterior motives, and what’s worse, they invade the personal space of someone they’ve just met without batting an eye.  

But my female friends say, [Boys are better when they’re aggressive and confident, right? That’s the vibe we like !] But I think that’s just a matter of personal preference.  

I don’t mean to judge others’ preferences, but I just don’t like it.

But I feel like I’m a coward for letting myself be swayed by others’ opinions and not being able to speak my mind.

One day, I met Seiji.

Seiji and I met after we both became members of the library committee, even though we were in different classes.

Most of the library committee members were lazy and didn’t want to join a club, but they also didn’t want to do the work of the library committee.

I wanted to do the work I was given properly, but when my classmates invited me to karaoke or bowling, and I refused, they said I was no fun, so I ended up skipping the library committee work too.  

However, Seiji said,  

[Oh, it’s okay, go ahead. I’ll take care of it.]

He was the one who looked the most bored during committee meetings and almost always slept during library committee gatherings, but at that moment, he was the only one trying to do the work properly.

Unlike someone like me, who just thinks about it but can’t act on it and gets swept along by others.  

[Wait, this many books…all by yourself?]  

[Ah….well, I’ll manage in an hour or so. Besides, your friends are waiting for you in the hallway, right?]

I couldn’t help but gasp.  

There’s no way this can be done in an hour.  

I sincerely respected him, and more than anything, comparing him to myself, I realized how small I was.

[I’m sorry…next time, I’ll definitely help you !] I said, and ran away to my friends.  

That day, playing with my friends was very boring. I was just pretending to be happy.  

From that day on, I decided to act according to my true feelings.

The first thing I thought at that moment was,  

[I want to be friends with him.]

From then on, I started talking to Seiji whenever my friends weren’t looking. At first, Seiji looked annoyed, but gradually we became closer and even talked about our shared interest in manga.  

I also realized that if I actively participated in the library committee work, the others would also do their jobs properly. Thanks to Seiji, I came to understand the importance of taking initiative.

One day, during lunch break, I went to the rooftop where Seiji often hung out, as usual.  

Hanzo kun was there as usual, but he quickly left the rooftop with a smug expression.  

Then Seiji, looking embarrassed, said,  

[Hey….want to go on a pilgrimage to the holy sites of that anime? No, it’s not like I have any ulterior motives, but you know, it’s more fun to go with someone who likes the same anime, right? Well, anyway…]

I almost laughed at Seiji’s desperate expression as he tried to hide his embarrassment, but more than that, I was very happy.  

It was the first time I had felt this happy.  

After that, Seiji and I went on several dates that we called ‘holy site pilgrimages’ and we started dating.

[I really like your smile, Karen. I want to keep making you smile forever, so, if you’re okay with me…]

[With pleasure ! ! !]

I ended up agreeing pretty eagerly.  

Because it was just too long.  

But that meant he really cared about me, right?  

I was truly happy.  

—However, I hadn’t told anyone that I was dating Seiji.  

I couldn’t bring myself to tell everyone that I had a boyfriend.  

Because all my female friends were the type who valued brand power in men.

Only someone who knows Seiji well can understand his charm.  

Maybe if I had properly explained Seiji, they wouldn’t have said anything, but I hated the idea of people talking badly about the person I liked, so I was too scared to say anything.  

But that was a mistake.  

One day, my first female friend from high school—Yoshizaki Ayame—invited me to go to a café together.

There was no reason to refuse, and more than anything, Ayame had helped me make more friends, so she was an important friend to me.  

So I went to a café near the school with Ayame. There, I saw  

[Hello ! Are you Karen chan?]  

Ayame said she wanted to introduce me to Arima Itsuki, a model, as a surprise.

I was confused.  

If this was going to happen, I should have told Ayame and the others about Seiji from the start, and maybe even bragged about him. I deeply regretted it.  

That day, we talked at the café and parted ways, but later, Ayame apparently spread the word to her female friends, and I was told by my other friends as well.  

[That Itsuki kun !? You should definitely date him ! Right?]

[I’d even want to date him myself ! I’m so jealous !]

…The only person I truly love is Seiji. My boyfriend is Seiji alone.  

No matter what others say, I won’t be swayed.  

So I decided to be honest with Itsuki kun and not give him any false hope.  

[I’m sorry…but I actually have a boyfriend…]  

I met with Itsuki kun again at the café and spoke honestly.

He’s a model and a student, so he’s busy, but he took time out of his schedule to meet me, so I thought he might be angry. But Itsuki kun wasn’t.  

[I see…yeah, I kind of had a feeling.]  

[Eh….]

[You know, I kind of get it. A girl in love is the most beautiful and radiant thing in the world. It’s not about her appearance or anything like that, it’s the aura that comes from her heart….]

[Did that sound too cheesy?] Itsuki kun said with a shy smile.  

Then Itsuki kun listened to my lovey-dovey stories about Seiji with a smile.  

Even though most people would find it annoying, he didn’t make a single unpleasant face and sincerely enjoyed listening to my stories.  

I never knew that being honest about my feelings could be so much fun.

After that, Itsuki kun said,  

[If you’re okay with it, would you like to stay friends? Just talking like this is fine, and if you ever have a fight with your boyfriend…with Seiji kun, I can give you advice or share my perspective as a guy.]

At that moment, I was filled with relief that someone could be honest with me without any ulterior motives, and that he listened to me instead of getting angry when I told him I had a boyfriend.

[Yes…okay !]

I can tell this person about the things I like without holding back. I can talk about things I can’t tell my classmates, and I feel safe doing so.

Ah, I’m so glad I made a good friend.

I should probably tell Seiji about Itsuki kun, but given Seiji’s personality, he might worry unnecessarily and create a tense atmosphere…..I’ll keep it to myself for now, until the time is right.

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