Source
https://kakuyomu.jp/works/2912051598917319858
The atmosphere in the large classroom after Golden Week felt a little different from before the holiday.
I get the feeling that the people here have become closer than before.
“Let’s hang out again,” “Where should we go next time?” “Where should we have lunch?”
I could hear comments like that coming from all around.
As soon as I, Ellis Wiegert, walked into the classroom, I spotted some students I used to take classes with.
Our eyes met for just a split second.
She gave me an awkward, forced smile and immediately looked away.
“……Good morning.”
“Yeah, Ellis chan. Good morning.”
She replied, and there were no belongings on the seat next to her.
I guess it’s okay to sit there, but it didn’t seem like she was actively inviting me to join her like she used to.
“I’m going to sit up front.”
Glancing sideways at her slightly relieved expression, I chose a seat at the front of the large lecture hall where no one else was sitting and took my seat.
“Look, there she is.”
“Oh, the one in that photo? Whoa, she’s super pretty.”
“Should I go talk to her…?”
“Don’t even think about it—she won’t give you the time of day.”
I could hear them whispering in hushed tones.
What bothered me most was that their voices were just loud enough that if I paid attention, I could make out what they were saying.
My mind would automatically tune in and pick up on their conversation.
Even so, I pretended not to hear them and took out my notebook.
It’s not like they were badmouthing me.
It’s not like they were doing anything terrible to me.
It’s just that they seem to think I’m a little hard to approach.
The girls I used to hang out with would also look troubled every time a boy spoke to them.
If just my being nearby makes them feel uncomfortable…
It’s better for them to keep their distance from me.
I don’t mind being alone.
After all, Rintaro will be waiting for me when I get home.
I sat through class in silence, and then it was lunch break.
When the large lecture hall suddenly became noisy, I gathered my things and stood up as if fleeing the scene. I’ll just go outside by myself and eat lunch somewhere out of the way.
Just as I was thinking that and heading toward the classroom exit—
“Oh, there you are, Elis!”
I heard the voice I’d been longing to hear—coming from a place where it shouldn’t have been possible.
What should I do…? Maybe I’m so desperate to see Rintaro that I’m hearing things?
Even as I thought that, I looked in the direction of the voice—
“Eh…”
Rintaro was standing right at the entrance to the large lecture hall.
Is this a hallucination now?
Thinking that, I rubbed my eyes, but what I saw didn’t change.
It’s Rintaro—Rintaro is really here.
As I stood there dumbfounded, Rintaro walked over to me.
“Rintaro, why…”
Seeing me frozen in place, unable to believe what was happening, Rintaro hesitated for a moment, cleared his throat, and gave an awkward smile.
“Let’s go grab some lunch.”
★ ☆ ★
The time had come to make a decision.
On the first day after Golden Week, I headed off to my first class, leaving Elis—who had fully recovered—behind.
“Have a good day.”
Elis saw me off from the living room.
Before, she used to follow me all the way to the front door and watch me leave with a wistful look until the door closed, but compared to those times, I felt a slight distance between us now.
──I’m sorry, Rintaro… I’m sorry…
Weakened by her cold, Elis was anxious that what she was doing might be destroying the “normal” life I cherished.
That’s probably why she started keeping her distance more than before.
She drew a line and made sure not to cross it herself.
If she kept it up, it would probably become “normal.”
Elis would get used to holding back, and I’d get used to relying on her like that.
That couldn’t possibly be right.
I was starting to realize that there isn’t just one kind of “normal.”
There’s a kind of “normal” where you go about your life at a moderate distance, unseen by anyone and without causing a stir.
There’s also a kind of “normal” where you stand out by being with someone, become the subject of rumors, and yet still stay by their side.
Up until now, I’ve just gone with the flow and chosen whatever “normal” fit the situation.
Just like elective classes in college, the “normal” that’s right for me is something I have to choose for myself.
To choose means to let go of the rest.
If I can only choose one—
This time, I want to choose the “normal” where I don’t leave Ellis behind.
—So, what I need to do is…!
With those thoughts on my mind, I couldn’t really focus on either my first or second class.
I copied the board notes into my notebook and listened to the professor’s lecture, at least superficially.
But in the back of my mind, I couldn’t stop thinking about Ellis.
I wonder if she’s paying attention in class right now.
I wonder if she’s alone again.
I wonder if she’s silently enduring things on her own, just so she doesn’t bother anyone.
Before I knew it, the second period had ended.
The professor wrapped things up about ten minutes early, saying it was a good place to stop.
“Oosaki, let’s go grab lunch.”
As I was packing up my things, Iwami called out to me.
Next to him were the guys I’d started talking to a few times in German class.
“Uh…”
For a split second, I almost nodded as I usually would.
Getting invited like normal, going out to eat like normal.
That was surely the college life I’d always wanted.
But today was different.
“Sorry, I’m planning to eat with someone else today.”
“Oh, really? A friend from your club or something?”
—That’s right.
I almost brushed it off with that, but swallowed the words.
I’m done with that kind of thing now.
“No… it’s a childhood friend from when I was in Germany—she’s in a different department.”
The moment I steeled myself and said it, the atmosphere around me shifted.
“Huh? I’ve never heard of her before!?”
“A childhood friend… is she a girl? Is she pretty!?”
“That’s way too direct…”
They latched onto it harder than I expected.
The pressure is intense—so intense.
“She’s a girl. Well, whether she’s pretty or not depends on who you ask…”
“That’s definitely how you’d describe a beauty!”
“Why didn’t you say anything until now?!”
“Introduce her to us! Introduce her!”
Just as the commotion was reaching its peak, Shino suddenly popped her head up from the side.
“What’s going on? I heard Rintaro has a stunningly beautiful childhood friend from Germany.”
“Where’d you come from?”
“I sensed something interesting was going on.”
Shino laughed without a hint of guilt.
But if I’m not mistaken, her eyes didn’t seem to be smiling…?
“Hey, Rintaro. I… don’t actually know this girl.”
“Sorry—now that you mention it, I guess I never had a chance to tell you… I only found out she was coming here right before I started school myself.”
“Hmm, I see.”
“Um, Shino? Are you mad or something?”
“I’m not mad or anything. It’s just that you’ve been friends with me for nearly six years, and you kept such interesting… important information a secret from me, didn’t you?”
“That sounds way too mean.”
But I couldn’t come up with a good comeback.
I hadn’t really told Shino about Elis.
A childhood friend I’d become close with back in Germany, whose family and mine were close.
Looking back now, Elis was special to me—probably the furthest thing from “normal.”
That’s why, when I decided to become “normal,” I think the first thing I hid was my connection with Elis, and I never told anyone about it.
“Well, whatever. Hey, I’d like to meet her too—is that okay?”
“Why would you say that?”
“Because I’m curious, aren’t I? Rintaro’s childhood friend…”
Shino’s gaze fixed on the bracelet on my wrist.
Come to think of it, did I even tell Shino that this was a gift from my childhood friend?
There’s no turning back now.
Just what I wanted… Since it’s come to this, I’m going to see it through to the end.
“…As long as she doesn’t mind. I’ll just ask her.”
“Alright, let’s go.”
“Why are you the one calling the shots?”
“They say you should strike while the iron’s hot, right?”
Shino started walking as if it were the most natural thing in the world, and Iwami and the others were completely on board.
“Are we really going? I’m coming too!”
“I’m way too curious about Oosaki’s childhood friend from Germany.”
This has turned into a bigger deal than I expected.
But having come this far, I can’t very well back out now.
I let out a small sigh.
This is fine.
If there’s no way out, this is better than going to pick her up alone in secret.
★ ☆ ★
On my way to the large lecture hall where Ellis was taking class, I thought about turning back several times.
“I guess our schedules didn’t work out after all—maybe next time,” I thought.
But I knew I couldn’t do that.
Because I’d decided right here, right now, to take this opportunity to change what it means to be “normal” for me.
When I arrived at the lecture hall, it looked like class had just ended.
The door swung open, and students poured out of the classroom in a stream.
Going against the flow, I stepped inside the lecture hall and spotted Ellis standing all alone up front, putting her textbooks away in her bag.
Her face showed no emotion whatsoever… and it seemed to reflect Ellis’s current situation… My heart felt like it was being squeezed by my own foolishness.
So, I steeled myself once more.
I took a deep breath and tensed my stomach—
Not just for Ellis, but loud enough for everyone else to hear as well…!
“Oh, there you are, Ellis!”
When I called her name, Ellis looked up.
“Huh…”
A look of surprise.
A look as if she’d seen something unbelievable.
Then Ellis rubbed her eyes and looked at me again.
What on earth is this girl doing?
Did she think she was having a dream or something?
Even in a situation like this, I almost started to laugh.
I walked over to where Ellis was standing.
I could feel all the eyes in the classroom and down the hallway turning toward me.
My heart was pounding with an unpleasant thud.
I felt cold sweat break out on my back and trickle down my spine.
But I can’t stop now.
“—Let’s go grab some lunch.”
Elis stared at me, looking completely dumbfounded.
“…Lunch?”
“Yeah.”
When I answered that, Elis’s gaze darted around the room.
Shino and the guys from the German class.
And then, Elis’s classmates in the classroom who were watching us.
“Rintaro, why… why did you do something like this…”
“It’s no big deal—asking someone to go out for lunch is pretty normal, right?”
“…………!”
Elis’s eyes, which were already large, widened even further.
Her eyes immediately welled up, and she sniffed once.
It seemed she was holding back tears.
—Well, what should I do from here…
This was as far as I’d planned.
Since it was such a haphazard, impulsive action—hardly what you’d call a “plan”—I hadn’t given any thought to what to do next.
“Elis chan, who is that…?”
Then, one of the girls who had been watching from a distance approached and asked timidly.
Judging by the way she addressed me and the distance she kept, she was probably one of the girls Elis had mentioned earlier who took classes with her.
Elis didn’t answer right away.
She looked at me as if she wasn’t sure if she should answer.
I knew exactly what that look meant.
—Is it okay to tell her?
I gave a slight nod.
Elis then smiled with uncontrollable joy.
Like a child who’d finally gotten something they’d wanted for a long time.
“It’s Rintaro, my childhood friend…right?”
Elis looked at me, as if seeking final confirmation.
I had a way out.
If I’d just smiled vaguely and brushed it off, I might have been able to pass it off to everyone in this huge classroom as just an acquaintance.
But I hadn’t come all this way just to take that way out.
“Yeah, we were together back when I was in Germany.”
At that moment, it was Ellis’s classmates who reacted.
“Childhood friend…?”
“Huh, with Ellis?”
“That’s why your Japanese is so good…”
A murmur rippled through the classroom.
Meanwhile, Iwami and the others standing behind me were frozen in place, staring at Ellis right in front of them—more so by her presence than by the words “childhood friend” themselves.
“…Osaki.”
“What?”
“We’re best friends…!”
“I never said I’d introduce you, though.”
Even as they exchanged these words, I could feel the number of stares piercing my back increasing.
Ah, it’s over.
The “normal” life I’d been trying to protect has been completely shattered by what just happened.
But Ellis, right beside me, looks so happy she’s almost in tears.
If that’s the case, then it must have been worth breaking it.
“Elis, someone from our class says they want to talk to you…”
“Sure. I want to say hello to Rintaro’s friends, too.”
“Doesn’t that sound a little off?”
“You’re just imagining things.”
Iwami and the others visibly tensed up at Eris’s beaming smile.
It was kind of funny how they’d been clamoring for me to introduce them just a moment ago, but now that they were actually face-to-face with her, they suddenly turned as timid as a cat that’s been borrowed.
We ended up heading to the school cafeteria as things unfolded.
Naturally, while being bombarded with questions by Iwami and the others.
It was a total spectacle.
But Ellis, who had been sitting alone in the seat in front of me just a moment ago, was now right next to me.
That alone was more than enough.
As we sat down, Ellis gently leaned toward me.
“Hey, Rintaro.”
“Hm?”
“Sagst du nicht, dass wir zusammenwohnen? (Aren’t you going to say we live together?)”
“……Sag ich nicht. (I’m not saying that.)”
Ellis, now in a great mood, got carried away and started teasing me.
I’d revealed that we were childhood friends, but saying we lived together was a step too far…
“Feigling (Coward).”
Elis was grinning, a seductive smile playing on her lips.
…Maybe the fact that we live together would become common knowledge among the others in the not-too-distant future.
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