Source
https://kakuyomu.jp/works/16817330660090929375/episodes/16817330661383277946
“……Finally, it’s done.”
While holed up in my lab, I completed the drug that would cure Onii san’s childification.
I think it’s amazing that I developed a cure in a little over a week.
“……But what should I do…..?”
To be honest, I don’t want to use this cure just yet.
Because the Onii san in a child’s body is too cute.
It would be a shame to undo that cute Onii san in just a week.
I want to flirt with him more.
“……Onii san…..”
I suddenly remember the time when I first met him.
◆
I was surrounded by idiots.
I don’t know of a word lower than [incompetent] so that’s the only way I can describe it.
From the time I was a baby, I was different.
I was smart, the adults I talked to said that, but that’s not true.
They’re just stupid, even for an adult.
…This way of thinking itself may be different from other people.
“Aoi chan, let’s play ! !”
Who was it?
When I was in the early grades of elementary school, I was invited to play by someone.
I can’t remember the girl’s face. Or rather, I didn’t even recognize her in the first place.
To me, most people are no better than monkeys. I think I recognized them only as fleas.
Can you recognize a flea as an individual? Impossible.
The only exception would be family members.
They are far less intelligent than I am, but for some reason I cannot recognize them as fleas.
Is it because they are family members, or is there some other factor?
I don’t know, but I feel comfortable spending time with my family.
“Mr. Shinryuji”Shinryuuji san, you have to get along with everyone, okay?”
That’s what my teacher at school told me, but I didn’t really understand.
It is difficult for me to befriend a fleas.
Because I’m a human being.
Humans can only get along with humans. I think fleas should get along with other fleas.
“A-Aoi chan ! ! I-I like you, Aoi chan ! !”
Disgusting.
That’s what I really thought when my elementary school classmate confessed his love to me.
In what world is there a weirdo who is happy to be liked by a flea?
At least, I’m not good with insects, so I was not at all happy when he confessed to me.
Well, I recognized insects in terms of interest because their body structure and ecology are interesting.
On the contrary, I was only aware of it to the same extent as my interest in insects.
“Aoi, did something happen to you at school?”
“……”
My older sister, Midori Onee san, looked into my face and asked me such a thing.
Yeah, it’s not the same after all.
For some reason, I can only recognize my family.
This is probably the reason why I’m still barely a social life form called a human being.
Human beings cannot live alone.
But the only people around me that I could recognize as human were my family members.
–That was until I met that person.
That day came suddenly.
I think it was when I was in the middle of elementary school.
One day, Midori Onee san said to me, [Stop reading all the time, let’s go outside and play sometime ! !] and we went to the park.
Midori Onee san was playing with someone else, and I was left out.
…..I wondered why she was taking me out…….
I was thinking about this when I was making the Tokyo Skytree, Osaka Castle, and the Great Buddha of Nara in the sandbox.
Then.
“Wow, that’s awesome…….”
Someone was looking at my work.
“Did you make this?”
Oh, he was talking to me……. This is why I hate playing outside.
It’s so depressing to be approached by a flea.
“……Looks like your eyes are kind of dead. Did you have a bad day?”
“……”
Something bad. You’re talking to me right now.
“If it’s okay with you, I’ll give you a consultation ! ! I’m just listening though ! “
“……? What do you mean?”
Just listening? Normally, in such a case, the person would tell the client to leave it to them.
When I tilted my head, he said.
“Well, because, I’m a kid……. And there is nothing I can do. On the contrary, do you think I can do anything?
“…….I don’t think so.”
“Right? A kid is helpless, hahaha.”
It might have been the first time.
I had never seen someone who recognized themselves as powerless.
Everyone, whether they are a child or an adult, has no small amount of self-confidence.
I am no exception. I have no small amount of confidence in my own brains.
But this person understood his own powerlessness and dared to laugh it off.
This person is not a flea. A flea does not realize its own powerlessness.
For the first time, I recognized someone other than my family.
……Oh, so that’s what people look like……
Probably a little older than me. I think he’s about the same age as Midori Onee san.
“……Who are you?”
“I’m Asumi. You are?
“……Aoi.”
“So Aoi chan. Nice to meet you.”
Asumi smiles at me. Asumi Onii san.
“……May I consult with you?”
“Yeah, talk to me about anything ! ! I’m just listening ! !”
I told him everything.
I could only recognize someone other than my family as a flea.
I had not even told my family about my problems.
Then, as if muttering, Asumi Onii san said in a worried tone.
“You have a difficult life, don’t you?”
“……? Difficult?”
“Aoi chan, you are that one, aren’t you? You hate yourself when you look down on others, do you?”
“Tsu.”
My heart skipped a beat.
It was a fact that even I was not aware of.
I was aware of the fact that I looked down on others.
But I didn’t understand until he said that I hated myself.
……That’s right.
It is true that I hate myself like this.
There’s no way someone who looks down on people, despises people, and can love themselves like that.
“But that’s okay, isn’t it?”
“……Eh?”
What I couldn’t believe was that Asumi Onii san affirmed me like that.
“……Why is that?”
“Telling yourself that you’re the best. It’s surprisingly difficult to think like that. That’s why it’s amazing.”
“….I don’t really understand.”
“It means you don’t have to force yourself to look up. People often say you have to look up to others, right? I don’t think so. People look down and feel relieved because they think the place they are standing is the best. That’s just the way it is.”
Is he really a child?
He sounds like an old man on his deathbed, or like a philosopher who will go down in history.
“So I don’t think you need to limit what you want to do.”
“……Limit?”
“H-hm? Am I wrong? I felt like you were holding back,…….”
If you ask me, it is true.
I have been suppressing myself for a long time.
I have been trying to fit in with the fleas around me, to stay within the framework of society.
Yes, I have not been doing anything that I want to do.
I am no better than a flea.
Oh, I see.
Now I understand why I recognized my family.
My family is doing what they want to do. That’s why I like them.
I went back to the sandbox and made what I wanted to make.
“……Wow. Earth?”
“Yes.”
I made a sand globe. It reproduced the topography of the earth and I think it’s a very good job.
“Asumi Onii san. I will do what I want to do.”
“O-oh? Well, don’t be too reckless, okay? You have to take good care of yourself, okay?
“……I will do so.”
I nodded, looking away.
What I want to do. What is it that I want to do?
I thought about it calmly.
And then, my eyes suddenly met with Asumi Onii san’s. My heart jumped.
Ba-dump. It was different from before. My heart is pounding all the time.
My heart beats faster when I look at Asumi Onii san.
“……Hmm? What’s wrong?”
“……No, it’s nothing.”
I know what this is.
Love, I suppose.
Someone who affirms me, who even hated myself.
……Oh, love. I want this person to be mine.
“Erm? Are you okay?”
……No, not enough. It’s not enough to make him mine.
I want him to be next to me forever. Forever.
Yes, let’s make that. With my brain, I’m sure I can make it.
Eternal life, pursued by people in the past for many moons.
Immortality.
It would be a dream. Everyone would laugh at me if they heard it. But I was serious.
I want to obtain immortality and spend eternity with Onii san.
Oh, I want the knowledge now.
I’m not going to play along with those lousy fleas anymore.
◆
“Haa…..! !”
Apparently I was asleep before I knew it.
“……,I’m almost there. Onii san.”
The Elixir of Immortality is very close.
The rejuvenation potion that Onii san inhaled is actually a prototype of the Elixir of Immortality.
Almost there. I’m so close.
Once the Elixir of Immortality is completed, I can be with Onii san forever.
No one must know about this plan.
Especially my sisters.
If they knew about my plan, they would choose immortality themselves without hesitation.
“Fufu, so close. I love you, Onii san.”
The one who changed me. The one who taught me something about myself that I didn’t know.
Oh, I love you so much. I will never, ever let you go.
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