Episode 28 – About what?

“…The heck? Renka is here too? Then you should have said so from the start.”

Akito said that, then immediately looked away from me. He didn’t sit down for a while after that.

…That’s right. Of course he wouldn’t want to be with someone like me.

“Come on, Akito kun, just sit down for now, okay?”

“…Hmph. Well, if that’s what you say, Sena, then fine.”

Akito sighed and sat down next to Sena as if it was natural.

…Until now, Akito’s seat was always next to mine.

I’m sure he’ll never sit next to me again. Thinking that, my chest tightened with pain.

“So, Sena. What do you want? I already apologized for yesterday.”

“It’s not me who has business with Akito kun. Right, Renka?”

“U…uh, yeah.”

Akito’s gaze shifted and looked at me.

But…his gaze felt colder than usual.

It was painful, so I couldn’t help but look away from him.

“…What’s the matter?”

His voice was low. Is he angry?

That’s right. I said something like that, so of course he’s angry.

But that’s why I have to apologize to Akito.

“Um…I…um…”

My voice trembles. I can’t get the words out properly.

What should I do? If I start crying here, Akito will definitely hate me even more. He’ll look down on me as a childish person. I really don’t want that to happen.

But…the words that are on the tip of my tongue keep disappearing no matter how many times I try.

“…If you have something to say, I want you to say it quickly.”

“Ah…um, yeah. Well, um…”

“Renka. Relax, okay?”

Sena gently soothes me.

…That’s right. My important best friend is being so considerate of me. Yet I’m still moping around. This is disrespectful to Sena, isn’t it?

I take a deep breath. I try to calm my racing heart a little.

And then, I…

“Akito…I’m sorry about yesterday…!”

—I finally said it.

I bow my head as deeply as I can toward Akito.

But.

This isn’t nearly enough.

“I really didn’t mean to say such a thing…at that time, I misunderstood. When I saw Akito with Suzukita san, I thought maybe you were faking it…”

I desperately keep moving my mouth.  

I can’t see his face. No…I’m too scared to look at him. Thinking about what kind of expression he might have on his face makes me feel like I’m being crushed by anxiety.

“But…if I had just thought about it, I would have realized that Akito isn’t the kind of person who would lie like that. Yet I hurt him like that without even listening to his side of the story…I’m really sorry…”

“…Renka. Just look up for now.”

Akito’s voice.

I do as he says and look toward Akito.

Then I see that Akito is…looking at me with a very gentle expression.

My favorite, usual, indifferent yet calm smile.

“I’m the one who should apologize for yesterday. I’m the one who did something that caused a misunderstanding, and I wasn’t angry about what you said from the beginning.”

“…Really…?”

“Yes. In fact, I’m grateful to you, Renka.”

“—Eh?”

Calmly.

Akioto continues speaking.

“Renka, thank you. For letting me hear your true feelings.”  

…What does that mean?  

What are your true feelings?  

“Actually, I overheard something a while ago. Renka, you were talking to your club friends, right? You said you hated me.”  

“…No ! That’s not…!”

“But yesterday, you told me the truth. So—Renka, you can relax now. I won’t bother you anymore, and I won’t talk to you again. I’ll try to do my best on my own, so please don’t worry about me anymore. That way, we can both be more at ease, right?”  

I have to say it…I have to say it quickly.  

That’s not true. It’s not my true feelings. I have to tell Akito that.

But…but why?  

Why is Akito making such a happy face…  

Why is he trying to push me away with such a happy voice…  

Once I started thinking that way, everything just fell apart.  

“Well, I guess that’s that. …Sorry, Sena. Just because we’re childhood friends doesn’t mean we can keep things the same forever.”  

“….Are you really okay with that, Akito kun?”

“Well, yeah. If someone tells me they hate me that clearly, I can’t just ignore it. Keeping our distance is probably the best decision.”

“But…then, what about Renka…?”

“I’m saying this for Renka’s sake.”

Akito’s voice grew even lower.

Sena shuddered, her shoulders trembling.

“…I see. I’m sorry, Akito kun. I’ve been saying all the wrong things…”  

“No…I’m the one who’s sorry. But please understand—I don’t want to get hurt any more than I already have.”  

Akito stood up.

—Wait, listen to me.

—I don’t want to keep my distance.

I thought I should say it quickly.

But I couldn’t bring myself to say it out loud.

“Finally….Renka. I’m really sorry that such a useless person is your childhood friend. Because of me, you’ve had to endure unpleasant feelings all this time.”

“….I….”

“But that will end today. —See you, Fujisaki.”

Wait—I couldn’t even say those few words.  

I just stared at his receding figure.  

Eventually, I grasped the meaning of his words, “End today.”  

…Hey. Tell me, Akito.  

What does “end today” mean?  

Akito—what did he put an end to between us……?

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