Source
https://kakuyomu.jp/works/16818093093605365078/episodes/16818093094617538192
◆(Hinayo)
“—-Since you have such beautiful eyes, why don’t you try cutting your bangs?”
That comment, which was said to me in the middle of my conversation with Hirakawa kun, has stuck with me for a long time.
Because up until now, I had been told that my eyes were “staring” “scary,” or “are you mad at me?”
I had been told by relatives that I looked like a beautiful doll when I was little, but I soon realized that it was just flattery.
I gradually became uncomfortable making eye contact with people, so I grew my bangs anyway to avoid eye contact.
To say that my complex is “wonderful” is transparent flattery.
Hirakawa kun would never think that. He is a kind-hearted person who can say such things without destroying the atmosphere.
……Even though I know it’s flattery, I still get a tingle of excitement.
If someone you have some sort of crush on says something like that to you, it’s obvious that anyone would be easily fooled.
It is not that I’m naive !
While I’m thinking about this, Hirakawa kun takes off my school uniform.
I thought it was only in the world of erotic manga that a man would politely take the lead with such a shady, ugly girl.
I don’t have a good face, and my body is also plain.
No man would be happy to see my body, which is so uneven and devoid of any trace of femininity.
But he stroked me gently with all his heart. Such a soft and gentle touch, I feel like I’m going to get addicted to it.
That would lead to a misunderstanding.
“Ah…..sorry, I got a little too impatient, didn’t I?”
“I-it’s not that. I…..have very small tits, or rather a very plain body,…….s-so I’m sure Hirakawa kun will get turned off…..after all, today….”
“That’s not true. Look, have you seen this guy….?”
Saying that, Hirakawa kun took my right hand.
Eh……? Is this Hirakawa kun’s……?
T-this big….thing….?
“Yeah, Nishimeya san, you had a naughty look on your face, it made my heart race.”
“Huuh……”
What’s with this guy???
Don’t you know girls’ favorite spots too well???
It’s common knowledge in this world that boys don’t get excited just by looking at a girl’s body or face.
But if he reacted like that when he saw my low-level stuff, it would be too much.
My mind was already boiling and I could not think properly.
During the whole act, no matter what was said, I could only say “Huuh…..” or “More……” and we ended up doing it in the nurse’s office.
I wondered with a flabby head if I could be so mentally and physically fulfilled.
Thus, I graduated without incident.
Maybe today is the climax of my life. I might die tomorrow.
I couldn’t get Hirakawa kun out of my mind even after I went home.
It feels like a dream to be one with my favorite person.
“Huuh……”
I can’t help but scream when I remember it.
It was that eerie.
But after I came to my senses, I realized something.
I’m glad that I lost my virginity to my favorite person, Hirakawa kun.
But if you think about it, that was just me doing something threatening…..?
So, it’s not that we became lovers. On the contrary, we are not even friends.
There is a possibility that we will never be friends again.
I don’t like that.
Even if we can’t do naughty things, there’s no way I could get Hirakawa kun to turn to me.
…Well, maybe it’s impossible not to do anything naughty.
Then what should I do? What should I do?
Before I could think I had scissors in my hands.
I have a complex about my eyesight, and I’ve been growing my bangs all over to avoid eye contact with others.
I decided to cut them off.
“—–Since you have such beautiful eyes, why don’t you cut your bangs?”
I could be fooled by those words. I don’t care if I end up being bullied again for my eyes.
By cutting my bangs, I wanted to state that I was aware of Hirakawa kun’s words.
I cut my bangs by watching YouTube and imitating what I saw.
My vision brightened tremendously, and when I looked in the mirror, my eyes met my own.
“…..I wondered if he would tell me I looked wonderful again.”
With a mixture of great anxiety and a little bit of anticipation, I welcomed the next day.
※※※
As soon as I arrived at school, the classroom was buzzing.
I felt like my heart would be hurt if I heard what everyone around me was saying, so I quickly shut them out by putting on headphones with Sakanaction playing at full volume.
Cool, isn’t it, Sakanaction?
Even though I can shut out the sound, I’m still concerned about the stares around me.
The loss of my bangs makes it even more so.
Everyone is looking at me.
This is probably called a curious look.
A shady ugly girl is staring with her bangs cut off.
They must think so.
But it doesn’t matter. As long as my feelings are conveyed to Hirakawa kun, that’s all that matters.
–And then.
Suddenly, I was tapped on the left shoulder.
When I turned around, it was not Hirakaw -kun, but his best friend, Fujisaki kun.
He is tall, has a salty face, and is a bit calm, but his body is well-trained from the basketball team. He is what is called a thin macho.
He is always next to Hirakawa kun, so I know him well.
But I don’t have much to do with him at all.
I wonder what is going on. I take off the earphone on the left side.
“Nishimeya san, you cut your bangs, didn’t you?”
‘Eh, oh….y-y-yes……”
“I think it changed you image a lot and brightened it up. That’s really nice.”
“Huuh ……”
Before I showed it to Hirakawa kun, I got an unexpected reaction from Fujisaki kun.
Apparently, my bangs cut left a good impression on me. This might be the first time a guy has spoken to me outside of business meetings.
After a while, Fujisaki kun brought Hirakawa kun who had just arrived at school.
This was the first thing he said to me.
“I told you, you should cut your bangs.”
My head was so full of thoughts that I could only respond with, “Huuuuh…….”
I’m glad I cut my bangs.
No, I shouldn’t be satisfied here.
Hirakawa kun said there is still room to grow. I need to improve myself more.
I became even more determined to break away from being an introvert.
….I need to make more opportunities to get involved with Hirakawa kun.
I had become completely fascinated with a plain boy named Hirakawa Asahi.
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