Source
https://ncode.syosetu.com/n9874hy/85/
…..From TV, there is a news report of an accident. Apparently, a woman my age fell off the platform and was hit by a train. I felt sorry for her. But more than that, I felt sorry for myself for the life I was leading.
I was living in a small apartment with mold on the walls for some reason. The only furniture was a refrigerator, a TV, and a bed. I had never done proper housework, and the kitchen, where I had cooked only once, smelled mysteriously strange.
I work a number of part-time jobs, skip meals, don’t have a smartphone, and somehow manage to maintain my current lifestyle by cutting back on a number of things. It is not unusual for me to do manual labor or work a day job and come home late at night or in the morning.
How did this happen? It’s because of that damned incident, of course. My life is a mess because of him.
☆
My life is not going to get any better when I get out of the house. I was expelled from high school. I couldn’t even go back to my parents’ house. However, the conditions at my parents’ home were not very good.
On the wall of the house, there were a lot of abusive comments about me and my family, and it smelled like garbage and rotten food.
“Hey, isn’t that the son of Kaisei san’s family?
“I’m pretty sure. Oh, I’m so scared.”
I turned around, curious about what I was hearing. I was annoyed. They were treating me like I’m a bad guy.
“Uwaa, he turned around.”
“He had an evil look on his face. Come on, let’s get out of here. We don’t want to get caught by him.”
“Yeah, I know. Let’s go.”
With that, the ladies scurried away from me.
…….Damn it, damn it, damn it ! What the hell do they think I am? I’m not some random murderer who targets everyone. I would never do such a thing !
I kicked the mysterious object away. It stuck to my shoe, and I shook my foot. Then, from somewhere, I heard a mocking laugh. Instantly, blood rushed to my head and I quickly walked away from the place with big steps. My shoes were still dirty and had a slightly offensive odor.
☆
……Why should I have to go through this? What did I do? The question came and went over and over again.
I still don’t think my actions were wrong.
Eri also said. [Kaisei is not wrong. What’s wrong is that it’s all Yuuki’s fault.]
That’s what Eri said to me when I made my plan before I got caught. So I have no regrets. It is the world that is wrong. It’s him who has brought us down. And yet we were the only ones to blame.
Besides, in the end, I only carried out the plan, it was Eri’s idea. Ruri was also in on it. Was it only my fault? Was I wrong?
At least, in the past, I wasn’t wrong in any way.
☆
In the first year of high school, I set Yuuki up. Honestly, I was annoyed that he was going to confess his feelings to Eri. The inferiority complex I had felt toward that guy in the past somehow vanished and became a sense of superiority.
In fact, I could say that I looked down on him. So, I decided to beat him to a pulp so that he would never be able to do such a thing again.
On the day of the event, I took a good look at Yuuki’s figure. Lately, even though I’ve seen something, I haven’t been able to focus on it. In comic books, he is like a mob figure whose face is not even drawn.
When I saw him for the first time in a while, he seemed kind of…gloomy. Not only was his eyes hidden by his long hair, but he was wearing his school uniform as per school rules. He was always looking down, and to be honest, he didn’t look good enough for us.
He was not the Yuuki I had admired in the past, the Yuuki I had felt inferior to.
(Would you try to confess to Eri like that? Have you ever looked in a mirror?)
I had a casual conversation with Yuuki, making fun of him inwardly like that.
And then I set Yuuki up. The look on Yuuki’s face at that moment was priceless. The way his face contorted in pain and betrayal.
I had thought that we would gain more momentum from here after he disappeared. That’s what I thought. From the next day, a dark cloud began to hang over our spectacular future.
Nakano senpai and Shiori san, Yuuki’s sister, came out. Yuuki went back to being a good-looking guy. I dropped out of the starting lineup. Eri gained weight. Ruri’s skin became rough. We were no longer in the top caste.
I couldn’t forgive him. I couldn’t believe it.
It was as if those days before the summer vacation were a lie.
We played around until late at night every day, sometimes sleeping in hotels with Eri and Ruri, and our self-centered world continued on no matter how far we went.
And yet, the light that illuminated our path was gone, and darkness enveloped us.
In that darkness, Eri lit a small light.
“I wish Yuuki were dead, don’t you? ……Kaisei.”
“……Hmm? Ah,…..right……I hope he dies, I hope. ……I’ll Kill him…..”
If he dies, everything will be all right. If he’s gone…….
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Thought this was finished and axed from the way last chapter ended. I’ve seriously no idea if the author ever had friends with how he’s making his characters act. Forgot a bunch of stuff from this story since the last update was a year ago or something, but how the hell did mc ever maintain a relationship with these people and for quite some time at that? His ex-friends all seriously hate him for some reason. Thx for the translations