Source
https://kakuyomu.jp/works/16818093094471724561/episodes/822139838884685091
“Wait, wait!”
“Yeah, no way. I’m not waiting.”
“Seriously, wait! I’m losing, losing!”
Right now, the goddess and I were getting hyped playing a game.
Home really is nice, isn’t it? So relaxing. During training camp, I got a bit homesick, so I really missed home.
I’m more sensitive than I look, so it takes me a while to adjust to new environments. It’s a pain, I know.
Just a different futon changes how well you sleep. Even slight differences in smell or softness make waking up feel like night and day.
I remember struggling to sleep when I first reincarnated here. Before, I slept on the floor, but after reincarnating, there was only a bed. I almost cried.
But I could never go back to the floor. Beds are the most comfortable to sleep in. Sleeping on the floor meant if my weight shifted unevenly, my body would hurt when I woke up, and I hated that. Once I thought about it, I realized that once you get used to it, beds are the most comfortable. Just knowing that made me feel like reincarnating was worth it.
My bed is still new, so I jump on it sometimes. It’s totally fine, and it’s still fun. I’ll do it again today.
“You just cheated!”
“No way. It’s skill. Pure skill.”
Like I’d cheat in a game I’m just playing for fun. A fun game is fun enough.
By the way, the game me and the goddess are playing is a fighting game. I don’t know, but can you even cheat in a fighting game? We’re on the same screen, using the same controllers, right?
“Ah! You cheated again!”
“I told you I didn’t!”
I’m not exactly a pro at games, you know? If she’s weaker than me, that’s saying something.
I wonder who’s weaker, her or Hisada-chan? It’d be a pretty good matchup, wouldn’t it?
“You’re totally cheating!”
“I told you I’m not! You keep saying I’m cheating, but how would I even do that? We’re using the same stuff!”
She’s dead set on making me out to be a cheater. Poor thing, she just can’t admit she’s weaker.
“Switch controllers! Yours looks way easier to use.”
“Nah, they’re the same. …Whatever. Here.”
I’m not a kid who’d get worked up over some pathetic loser like that, so I just hand the controller I was using to the goddess.
“Ugh…”
This girl… she did it.
“Your controller’s all sticky.”
“Sorry. I didn’t wipe my hands after eating chips.”
“Are you kidding me? I told you to use chopsticks, didn’t I?”
“I wanted to eat with my hands.”
I still don’t get people who eat chips with their hands. Obviously you should use chopsticks. Your hands get all sticky, you know? So what do you do with these hands?
“What do you do with your hands after eating?”
“One of three options: my clothes, my pants, or the sofa.”
What a shitty choice. The fact that the sofa is even an option pisses me off. I don’t know if you think you’re some kind of goddess or whatever, but don’t wipe your dirty fingers on someone else’s sofa.
“Please, just spare the sofa.”
Getting angry here might make her defiant, so I’ll just ask nicely. I just realized saying this to her means it’s something I really hate.
“Fine. Then I’ll wipe them on your shirt or pants.”
“…Huh?”
Please, let me have misheard that… Please, let my ears be bad… Please, give me permission to punch this girl.
“Hold on. So those three options were the sofa, my shirt, and my pants?”
“Yeah?”
How can this kid act like this is totally normal?!
Also, when did she start wiping it with my shirt and pants?! I should’ve noticed!
“Why my shirt and pants?!”
“Because my clothes would get dirty.”
This damn goddess…
“But my clothes and pants would get dirty!”
“I was wiping it off while thinking ‘I’m sorry’.”
“Oh, really? Well, that doesn’t mean I’ll forgive you.”
At least she does feel bad about it. That’s the only reassuring part. If she hadn’t felt bad, I would’ve had to rethink how to deal with her going forward. …Well, not really.
“Then where was I supposed to wipe it off?”
“That’s why I told you to eat with chopsticks!”
Does she have some kind of obsession with eating with her hands? If so, I’d really like her to stop.
“I want to eat with my hands because it tastes better that way!”
What a pain…
At this point, it’ll just turn into an argument, so one of us has to give in.
Which means I have to be the one to give in, right…
“Fine. I’ll get some wet wipes. Use those to wipe your hands next time.”
“You should’ve just done that from the start!”
“If you’d just used chopsticks from the beginning, this wouldn’t have happened! And if you hated eating with chopsticks, you should’ve said so from the start!”
I reluctantly stood up and went to get the wet wipes.
“I tried to make an effort, but before I knew it, I was eating with my hands.”
I know. I know this one never even tried to make an effort. That’s just the kind of person she is.
“Yeah, yeah, just make sure you wipe properly with these next time.”
I tossed the wet wipes I’d brought over to the goddess.
“Pug!”
When she tried to catch the wipe, it slipped through her fingers and hit her in the face.
I meant to hand it over gently, but now it looks like I threw it at her. I’m not that kind of petty guy.
“~~!”
“No, no, no! Don’t blame me! It’s just that your motor skills are shot!”
“It changed! The wet wipe bent mid-air!”
“What do you mean the wet wipe bent?! Question your own words!”
“It really bent! Like this, like this—”
“No, that’s not right. Like this, like this, it drew a straight trajectory…”
For the next several minutes, we argued back and forth about whether it bent or not.
“…Whatever. Let’s just play the game.”
“…Yeah, you’re right.”
They decided to restart the game, finding the whole thing ridiculous halfway through. …What the hell was that time just now?
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