Episode 25 – I thought that after overcoming this heartache, I would be happy with her

Morning. As expected, I couldn’t sleep at all.

There were terrible dark circles around my eyes, the level of which could not be concealed by even Misuzu’s concealer.

My hair was shaggy, my complexion was pale, and my cheeks were skinny. Honestly speaking. It was not a face I could show to others.

Still, I had to go.

Kitajima-san is waiting for me at the station, and Star is in the classroom. Hoshi kun’s there. Even though I’m being nominated to be the next student body president, I’m not sure if I should suddenly be late or absent.

“…… Onii chan, don’t you think you should rest?”
“Misuzu…… no, I’m fine.”

I smile at my beloved sister who speaks to me from behind with a concerned voice.
Misuzu says to me, raising her eyebrows slightly.

“…… maybe, but I have a feeling that Rinne chan is out there.”

I agreed with Misuzu’s words.

“Yeah. I think so too. But …… I don’t have anything to tell her.”
“……Hey, Onii chan. What happened …… yesterday?”

I answer Misuzu’s question.

“Rinne confessed her feelings to me.”
“…… Eh?”

I say with a laugh.

“[I’m going to be Kirito’s lover]. The reason for this is because [if we become lovers, we can become a family] and [it is the duty of an older sister to listen to her younger brother’s selfishness].”
“……Haaa. Sorry. Onii chan. I. I can’t do it.”

To Misuzu, I said.

“I was up all night thinking about why she’s so obsessed with family,…… but to be honest, I don’t really understand it.”
“…..I guess. She’s going crazy a little?”
“Maybe there’s a reason. But …… is already late.”
“Already …… late?”

I shake my head at those words.

“I have already decided to fall in love with Kitajima Towa san, no matter what Rinne thinks or feels. So even if there was some reason, I can no longer take it into consideration.”
Even if I think so, Rinne may have some big reason. If I knew that reason, I might …… hesitate.”
I was so angry yesterday that I lost control of myself. …… But I’ve loved Rinne for ten years. There might still be a chance. How I would fall in love with Kitajima Towa san if I knew what I knew. I’m afraid that I might waver in my decision to fall in love with Kitajima Towa san. That’s what I’m …… afraid of.”
So I have decided that even if Rinne is in front of my house, I will go to the station without talking or asking her anything.”

I say that much and laugh at Misuzu.

“It’s not cool. I don’t have a shred of manliness. Really, I hate myself. ……”
“It’s okay. Onii chan”
“…… Eh?”

Misuzu says to this pathetic man.

“Even if everyone in the world calls you the worst, even if you yourself think you’re the worst, I will always think you’re the best in the world.”
“Misuzu ……”

Misuzu hands me her bag.

“Here you go. Take care, Onii chan. I’ll leave you to it.”
“……Eh?”

Even though she usually sees me off at the door
She immediately told me the reason why.

“I don’t know what I would do if I saw Rinne chan right now.”
“Haha …… I see.”

I grabbed my bag from Misuzu and headed to the front door alone.

……Here she is

Haha. I know, we were together for ten years.
I can tell by the sign.
Yesterday I was caught by surprise, but if I watch her closely like this, I can sense it. I can feel Rinne’s presence.

I open the front door.

There I see ……

“….!!!”
“I’ve been waiting for you …… Kirito ……”

There was Rinne, with her uniform disheveled, dark circles under her eyes, pale complexion, shaggy hair, skinny cheeks, and no trace of the beautiful girl I had been.

Stop it! Don’t look at me like that!
You’re shaking my resolve!
You have a reason, don’t you?
Tell me!
Then maybe, just maybe, I can forgive you.
Maybe I can start over again.
You’d think so. ……

I bite my lip.

“I don’t …… have anything to …… to say to you.”
“……!”

Rinne looks like she’s about to cry.
Well yeah. You were always like that when we first met.
You always looked like you were about to cry, you looked bitter, you looked like you were in despair about everything in the world.
I wanted to make you laugh.
Now …… I’m doing …… the exact opposite. ……

“K-Kirito….Um….I…”
“S-Shut up! I’m going! You….You………”

I run to my bike to escape.

With a clank, I unlocked the bike and stepped over it.

Gachan

“No, no! Kirito…… don’t go…… talk to me……!”
“I won’t listen to you! I will not listen to you! You’re a …… stranger!”
“….!!!!”

I said and rode my bike as fast as I could.

Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful Painful My heart hurts …… painful painful ……

But beyond this pain of mine, there must be happiness with Kitajima Towa san……

I held down my taut chest and made my way to the station.

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