Source
https://kakuyomu.jp/works/16818093094088809262/episodes/16818093094136628503
At any rate, I urged her to take a bath.
“You can take a bath. I have a bathtub ready for you,” I said to her, and she just moved her head slightly.
There was no sense of joy or confusion, just a mechanical reaction.
Realizing that she had no clothes to wear, I pulled out an old T-shirt of mine and handed it to her.
It was so loose around her shoulders and sleeves that it looked like a big bag over her thin body.
I felt sorry for her because I didn’t have underwear for girls, of course, and decided to lend her my boxer shorts.
The waistband was so loose that it didn’t stop at the waist and would slip down.
This doesn’t make any sense….
I muttered to myself as I scratched my head, “At any rate, I need to get the bare necessities now…”
I’ve got to buy the essentials, even if it’s at a convenience store.
I put my coat on, determined to go out, and at that moment the sliding door to the changing room quietly opened.
Not five minutes had passed yet.
She came out with her wet hair hanging down, wrapped in a drab T-shirt.
Her pants were…she seemed to be holding them on with her hands over the T-shirt….
“Hey, hey, hey, did you get in at all? I’ve boiled water for you, so you can take a nice long soak.”
“If I stay in there too long…the water…will be wasted…”
“….Water? Seriously…you don’t use hot water?
“…Yes.”
At those words, Ito’s distorted face appeared in my mind, and the pit of my stomach grew heated.
What had he said to me and how had she been raised?
Just thinking about it made me want to crush my fists.
“…You don’t need to be so reserved here. You can take a hot shower and soak in the bathtub. You can use shampoo and body soap as you like.”
She stumbled back into the bathroom with her eyes downcast.
Her footsteps echoed on the tile, and the sound of the door closing was lonely.
I took the opportunity to run to a nearby convenience store and hurriedly bought a pair of girls’ underwear and a simple T-shirt.
I quietly left them in the changing room, but she still came out of the bath in less than 15 minutes.
“Your hair is soaking wet. What about the hair dryer?”
“……Father told me not to use it, so I don’t know how to use it…”
The bruises on the thin arms peeking out from the hem of the T-shirt were floating painfully in the dark.
They are deeply rooted in her body as if they were scars carved on a dead tree.
The wounds on her body may fade with time, but those carved in her heart will not disappear so easily.
“…Okay. Anyway, I bought this for you and I’ll do it for you, so come here.”
She stands there a little confused, but quickly walks toward me.
I sat her on my lap and carefully dried her wet hair with the warm air of the hair dryer.
Her hair is thin and I can feel its fragility every time it gets tangled in my fingers.
“Are you hungry?”
A small shake of the head.
Has she even forgotten how it feels to be hungry? She’s so slender.
A tightening sensation spreads through my chest.
“What’s your favorite food?”
“……Rice.”
“……Rice. What else?”
She shook her head again.
At that moment, my eyes got hot and I felt like I was about to burst into tears.
What’s wrong with me crying by myself, I scolded myself.
But when I think about the fact that hse probably lived on nothing but white rice without even a decent meal, I feel a sense of disappointment flood over me.
I suppress the urge to hug her, and touch her head gently.
I feel that if I suddenly feed her a lot of food, her body may not be able to accept it.
I’ll just have to get her used to it little by little.
For now, let’s start with the wounds on her body.
After drying her hair, I took a compress I had at home and gently applied it to her arms, neck, and cheeks.
The burns were discolored reddish-black, and the compresses might not be enough to catch up.
Maybe I should try an ointment, and if that doesn’t work, take her to the doctor.
But first, the procedure for living as a family… Adoption, was it?
I’ll have to do that, too.
But I have a week off. I’ll just have to take my time.
“All right, I’ll order lunch. Any food you don’t like?”
She shakes her head again.
“Okay. Then, pizza or sushi?”
“…..I’ve never had any of those……so…..I don’t know…”
“I see. Then, we’ll have sushi today.”
While ordering delivery, I order the necessities of life on the Internet.
A bed, clothes, towels—I tossed the things I thought she might need into the cart at random.
“Do you have a favorite color or character?” I asked, but she just shook her head.
When I looked away, she moved to the corner of the living room and sat down, holding her knees.
“You can sit on the couch, okay?” but after a little while, she goes back to the corner again.
It’s as if that’s her safe zone.
I think the fear of not knowing when I will change my attitude is probably holding her back.
I rack my brains trying to figure out how to reassure her.
While I’m thinking about this, the chime rings. Sushi had arrived.
“All right, let’s eat together.”
She gives a small nod of her head.
Spreading the sushi out on the table, I said, “You can have whatever you like, there are 50 pieces. The one the kids would like…maybe salmon. I still love it though” and put the salmon on her plate.
Then she glanced up at me, as if to make sure it was really okay to eat.
“….Is it okay? For me to eat it.”
I put a pair of disposable chopsticks in her hand, but she gave up with an unaccustomed hand and eventually grabbed the salmon with her tiny hands and brought it to her mouth.
It was adorable to watch her eat so hard with a gesture like a squirrel gnawing on a nut.
Then she repeatedly chewed it as if savoring it.
“….Is it tasty?”
Then her eyes glittered for a moment and she shook her head strongly.
“….Ish….good…”
Her little voice and expression made my tear gland collapse.
“I wish…..I could’ve saved you…sooner…I’m sorry…!”
Tears overflowed and my voice choked.
I had many chances to help her.
I had visited that house so many times, but I pretended not to see it.
I told myself it didn’t matter.
But somewhere in the back of my mind, I must have known that I was the only one who could save her.
Working in the loan shark business, I’ve seen plenty of people suffer.
There was a girl who suffered similarly. But no other case was as bad as hers.
For the first time, I saw life in her eyes.
I was so happy about that.
Then, a single tear fell from her eye.
Seeing this, I threw the sushi into my mouth, crying even louder.
After eating about five pieces of sushi, she must have been full, because she started dozing off, rubbing her eyes.
I gently picked her up and carried her to bed.
She resisted in a small voice, saying, “I-in the floor…” but I told her, “You will sleep in my bed until the bed arrives. That’s an order.”
She looked troubled, but lay down on the bed and curled her body into a small ball.
I gently pulled the covers over her and whispered, “You can sleep as long as you want and wake up whenever you want.”
She fell asleep in the blink of an eye.
As soon as I saw her breathing in her sleep, I opened my computer and began to order the things I needed to continue my daily life.
It felt surprisingly good to do something for someone.
I wondered if she would be pleased.
With these thoughts in mind, a busy week began.
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